Sharing Musts For A Healthy Marriage

Most are familiar with the practice of hitting the “share” button on You Tube, Facebook, etc.  in order to send something you found worthwhile for your friends and family to see and/or read.  Sharing social media with others is as easy as hitting a button.

But in marriage sharing doesn’t come quite as easily.

In our 33 years together we’ve made some observations in the marriage relationship, which we believe requires total and complete sharing – no holding back.  We’ve come up with our own top ten list of sharing musts for a healthy marriage.

We’ll spend the next few Sundays sharing with you our thoughts on this.  Please note, this list is not a biblical command.  It is simply the observations we’ve made personally. You may or may not agree completely.  You may not share with your spouse some of the things we’ll have on our list.  This doesn’t mean we think your marriage is unhealthy, and we would love to hear how it works for you.  Let’s begin the conversation:


Most families plan to take a vacation at some time during the year.  They may not go anywhere, but their own backyard.  Yet there are some married couples who take separate vacations – the wife may take the kids home to see her family for a week.  The husband may go fishing or golfing with the guys.  On their own each of these are fine, even good fun.  But if these are the only vacations you’re taking with no special “off work” time to enjoy as husband and wife, we see this as detrimental to a healthy union. All marriages need down time to take root and grow stronger.  Vacations are one of the best opportunities to have undivided time together, to play, to rest, to laugh and to enjoy being together.  If all this quality time is given to someone other than your spouse the marriage will suffer for it.  But imagine if you’re sharing this time together year after year – the memories you’ll make and consequently share for a lifetime.  This is our story.  We have memories we share together that we enjoy over and over as we reminisce.  And there is no one else who shares these memories except US.


When was the last time you sat down and talked about tomorrow – your future – together as a couple. Does your spouse know what you dream about, what you hope for for the future? When you were dating and engaged you most likely spent hours talking about what your future would look like.  Once the wedding was a memory and the first apartment was chosen or house was bought, it’s easy to slip into a comfort zone that is unhealthy.  We all dream, but we don’t all talk about them.  Make an effort this week to draw your spouse out about what is on their heart for the future.  You may be surprised at some of them. If you aren’t, good job!  It is important to keep your dreams alive, and it is important for your spouse to be on board with you in those dreams, and vice versa. We end with one of my favorite songs about dreams – if you know me well, you’ll know it’s from my favorite movie.


This is post #2 in The Ultimate Blog Challenge to post everyday in October.


About Debi Walter

Tom and Debi have been sharing encouragements through their blogs for many years. Marriage, Reading God's Word and documenting family history is our focus. Growing in our relationship with the Lord is primary in all we say, write or do. We are grateful for all who desire to join us in the same endeavors.
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11 Responses to Sharing Musts For A Healthy Marriage

  1. Loved this post.
    Wonderful reminders.
    I look forward to more!!


  2. Debi Walter says:

    Thank you Cherie. It’s nice to meet you in the challenge. It should be a fun month.


  3. Great post, Debi. Bob and I were challenged when we were over your house the other night and you and Tom talked about some dreams. We continued the conversation a little later. Love you.


  4. Nancy Rose says:

    Sharing your dreams is one of my favorites. It allows you to truly know what inspires and drives the person, for without fulfilling dreams, life can be challenging even more.


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  6. Tara Kizer says:

    Thanks Debi! I agree these are both important. My husband and i were just married in April. My first…his second. I’ve spent the last 15 yrs as a single mother, so we both have our own life experiences that have shaped us…1hich makes it fun and interesting as we have come together 🙂 Anyway…being of an “older” age, we paid for our wedding (very modest) and did not take a honeymoon 😦 But…we are taking our first short “min-moon” this weekend to Eureka Springs. I’m excited about time alone w/each other…time for talking, time for intimacy, and time for new experiences shared together. Thank you for the reminder that this must be a priority!


    • Debi Walter says:

      We pray you will have a wonderful “min-moon.” Love that name btw. Very cute! We’ve never been to Eureka Springs, but the name alone sounds inviting! Enjoy every minute of your time away!


  7. Pingback: Sharing Musts For A Healthy Marriage 4 | The Romantic Vineyard

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