Photo Credit: Glogster.com
Bonnie Anderson with the Ship Bound For Tarshish blog is a good friend of ours. When we celebrated our third blogiversary she made the comment that three year olds are notorious for asking why this? why that? why? why? why?! So we thought this would be a good series to do where Tom answers the WHY questions about marriage. Today is our first installment with the following question:
Why is it important to study your spouse?
Because when you love someone you’re thinking about their highest good. It’s not about doing what I like as much as if it is what my wife likes or what will serve her best. How do you know what she likes and what pleases her unless you ask questions, pay attention to her comments and write down observations?
I have a folder on my phone where I can jot things down I want to remember. This comes in handy when I’m wanting to do something special without her knowing. You’ll soon discover, if you haven’t already, that women offer clues all the time. at least my wife does. She’s like a radio – always talking, but I may not always be tuned in. Tune into your wife, and you’ll learn a lot about who she is and what she likes.
Photo Credit: fashioningtech.com
Debi is on the computer most days – all day long. She had been using a regular chair and started complaining about her back hurting. I told her one night we were going to the store to buy her a good office chair. She was thrilled. Now each day when she sits down I hear her say, “Ah!” This was small way where I noticed her need and provided for her in the best way I could. Besides I didn’t want her to file a workman’s comp claim. 🙂
It doesn’t have to be big in order to be meaningful either. Simple things like her favorite candy bar or drink handed to her before she even thinks to ask for it will bring a smile to her face and a connection to her heart.
Tune into your wife and see if your marriage doesn’t benefit greatly by your efforts.
How have you studied your spouse and served him/her recently? Did he/she notice?
The Romantic Vineyard 
Thanks for the mention, Debi and Tom. I love this segment.
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I thought you would – since you inspired it! 🙂
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Awesome idea. Perhaps I should drop more hints or clues… :o)
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Great idea, Sharon. I think your husband would appreciate the hints too.
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My husband takes mental notes. I wonder if it’s because he has a photographic memory? He surprises even me.
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We should get him to offer a guest post sharing his secret. 🙂 You are blessed – thanks for sharing!
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I’m going to print this blog and tape it to the front of his computer game !!
That should do it !!
moggie
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Haha! Great idea, Moggie. And I have a feeling you’re serious too. We say, whatever works!
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my husband coaches high school football. Since April his weeks have had anywhere from 2-7 days where he devoted a part of his day and himself to his team. Last weekend was his first w/o any commitments since April…I was tempted to invite him on a date but because I try to study and remember his preferences I gave him a weekend with no expectations instead. Saturday morning I presented him with a novel he has wanted but put off getting until after the season was over. It was the perfect thing and set the tone for a whole weekend of relaxation for him. He appreciated it so much and left him feeling understood and loved…pretty cool!
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What an excellent example of what we’re talking about. Not only did you study him, but you served him best by giving him a great weekend to relax in a way HE found relaxing. Good job!
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Tom – you the man!
Debi – two words: Standing desk!
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🙂 Thanks, Paul!
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My wife’s back will seize up, start to spasm if it gets cold. Tomorrow the van she drives mostly is going to a local shop to have seat heaters installed.
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What a kind gesture we’re sure she’ll appreciate! Thanks for sharing!!
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