Happy Is As Happy Does

Photo credit: behappyhq.com

Photo credit: behappyhq.com

Are you happy in your marriage? I’m not talking about being free from trouble or having an absence of problems, that hardly ever happens in any relationship. I’m talking about being happy IN your marriage.

Happy is defined as feeling or showing pleasure or contentment.

I believe happy is a choice we make. I love Tom with all my heart. Even when we’re in the midst of a conflict, I know he is my husband for life. He has the same commitment to me.  So we go after the trouble with the goal of finding resolve. We’re not content with discontent, if that doesn’t sound too strange. We find no pleasure in being displeased with each other. Instead I treat his trouble as our’s, not his alone. And he does the same for me.

Many marriages today treat their spouse the way they treat them. It’s as if they find pleasure in their displeasure. Television is full of examples like this finding it humorous, even. But it’s not funny; it’s sad.

What if we were to reverse this trend and treat our spouse the way we want them to treat us–and be patient in the process. We can’t choose one day to “try it” to see if they change. No, it has to be a lifelong commitment, a conviction even. When we apply this to our marriage, and submit our requests to God for help and hope, we will see changes. And it will bring great happiness to both of us.

I am a member of the Happy Wives Club. Fawn Weaver started it in 2010 to prove to the world that there are lots of happy wives–and her goal was to find one million of us to prove her point. Her new book titled, Happy Wives Club, chronicles her journey around the world to interview marriages that have lasted more that 25 years from various cultures and countries. I’ve read it, and it’s excellent! It felt as if I had traveled the world with her.

We’re giving away one copy in a random drawing on Friday. If you’d like to be included in the drawing, comment on this post sharing what one word you believe is essential for a successful, happy marriage. If you also share this post on FB (or any other social media) and let us know, you’ll double your chances of winning too. Good luck!

If you’d like to join the HWC, click here. 🙂

About Debi Walter

Face it, marriage is hard work. But when cultivated daily the fruit produced will satisfy for a lifetime. We're here to help with ideas and encouragement along the way. Having been married 40 years and counting, we share what we've learned with practical tips, Biblical Truths, Date night ideas to help you plow your own vineyard for God's glory.
This entry was posted in Christian Marriage, Growing Strong Marriages and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

11 Responses to Happy Is As Happy Does

  1. Lynne says:

    Commitment — day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, second by second if necessary! A committed, till death us do part, covenant!


  2. Kathy says:

    communication – shared on FB


  3. Diana says:

    Forgiveness. (Shared on FB)


  4. Helen O says:

    Trust – It’s difficult if you don’t trust your spouse


  5. kristin stratos says:



  6. Tina says:

    Committed and in it to win it! Truly blessed by a man of God! Forgiveness and unconditionL love every single day!


  7. Sylvia P says:

    Communication. Without it, so much goes wrong and misunderstood. Over the years, things become twisted and could have been righted by simply communicating.


  8. Holly says:



  9. charms25 says:

    Trust is important, I don’t trust my hubby and it’s hard. And some days it feels harder than others. To regain trust seems impossible . But I have heard it can happen. Time will tell.


    • Debi Walter says:

      Yes, trust can be rebuilt, but it takes time and lots of honest communication that can be painful. God is such a comfort to the one who is lacking trust and a hope to the one who broke the trust. I pray you find your marriage restored fully by the grace God supplies.


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