11 Possible Indicators You Have A Mediocre Marriage

MEDIOCRE. Just the sound of it is blah, don’t you think? I looked up the definition and found this interesting…

One of the things that is remarkable about mediocre is the extent to which it has retained its meaning over the course of more than four centuries of continual use. The word, when used as an adjective, has changed very little, if at all, in its meaning since it was used in a 1586 book titled The English Secretorie. (From Merriam-Webster’s on-line dictionary)

Look at the synonyms. They offer deeper insight into the understanding of this centuries old word.

The question is, “Does mediocre describe your marriage?

I find it interesting that those who are experiencing mediocre marriages tend to settle into it as their norm, in the same way the word has settled into its own definition without change for centuries.

What does a mediocre marriage look like?

I’m certainly no expert, but we have had almost 40 years of experience in our marriage. And we have known lots of couples with great marriages as well as mediocre ones.

11 (Possible) Indicators of a Mediocre Marriage

  1. Your life revolves around your kids.
  2. You no longer flirt with each other or share private jokes.
  3. You would rather spend an evening alone than with your spouse.
  4. You can’t remember the last time you laughed together.
  5. You rarely go on dates or have fun together.
  6. You haven’t read any books on marriage recently and you have no desire to start.
  7. The first word that comes to mind in describing your marriage is “boring”.
  8. Time together is spent watching TV, running errands or doing things with the kids.
  9. Sex is sporadic at best.
  10. You’ve settled into believing this is just how marriage is after years of sharing life with someone.
  11. You believe your best days are behind you.

Do any of these hit home? 

If you chose more than one it reveals you have work to do in your relationship. Our desire is to convince you that this doesn’t have to be your norm. You can have a marriage that is growing and changing for the better as each year passes.

The start of making any change in your marriage is seeing the areas in need of change in the first place!

Begin by talking about these 11 indicators together and pray for God to help you. He loves such prayers and is able to accomplish that which seems impossible to us. I pray this brings you hope.

We’ll discuss some practical tips in our next post. Until then…

“Don’t settle for mediocrity. Take a chance. Take a risk. Find that passion. Rekindle it. Fall in love all over again. It’s really worth it.” Brian Cranston

About Debi Walter

Face it, marriage is hard work. But when cultivated daily the fruit produced will satisfy for a lifetime. We're here to help with ideas and encouragement along the way. Having been married 36 years and counting, we share what we've learned with practical tips, Biblical Truths, Date night ideas to help you plow your own vineyard for God's glory.
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