Confessions of a Marriage Blogger

Posted on April 1, 2019 by Debi Walter

I have a confession to make. As a marriage blogger for the past decade, my husband and I have heard countless ways our blog has been an encouragement to couples. Some we know and some we have yet to meet. We love knowing that The Romantic Vineyard has made a small impact on marriages around the globe.
However, I have to say my motivation is waning. Not for marriage, mind you, but to know what to write about that hasn't already been said.

I have a confession to make. As a marriage blogger for the past decade, my husband and I have heard countless ways our blog has been an encouragement to couples. Some we know and some we have yet to meet.

We love knowing that The Romantic Vineyard has made a small impact on marriages around the globe.

However, I have to say my motivation is waning. Not for marriage, mind you, but to know what to write about that hasn’t already been said. I value my time because it is fleeting. I know you value your time as well. It is a gift that must be stewarded. If I’m posting constantly, am I helping marriages, or just beating the same old drum because I enjoy the rhythm of writing?

This may sound discouraging. I don’t mean it to. These are the thoughts that race through my mind on a regular basis. When God speaks and gives me an idea for a post, I’m right there, ready to pound the keys with passion. But when He is silent, and I’m left to come up with ideas on my own, it can seem redundant.

I remember in 2011 when I entered my first blog challenge. I was encouraged to post everyday for 30 days. I was excited because there was so much to say. I had no idea how much the people I met during that challenge would mean to me in the years to come. It was a wonderful and enriching experience. And I am so glad I committed to do it.

I have been invited to participate in another Ultimate Blog challenge. This time for the month of April. Again, I hesitate because I don’t want to do this just because it is a good idea. I want to do it because God desires to use me to encourage marriages for His glory, not my own.

Our life has changed drastically since we began blogging in November of 2008.

1. We added 6 more adorable grandchildren to the two we already had.

2. We bought a cabin in the mountains of NC.

3. I began hosting Ladies Retreats each summer.

4. We sold our business.

5. I published my first book in 2012, Through The Eyes Of Grace.

6. Tom retired.

7. Both my Mom and Mother-in-law passed away.

8. Our two older adult, married kids moved to other states with all of our grandchildren.

9. Our last daughter got married and moved out of state.

10. We helped establish the Christian Marriage Bloggers Association in an effort to give our blogs some credibility, standards and safe guards for our readers.

11. We began a Marriage ministry in our local church to help couples continue to pursue each other and grow their marriage.

12. We published our first book together titled, Cherishing Us – 365 Tips to Help Your Marriage Grow.

It has been quite a transitioning decade, and our marriage has grown considerably amidst all the challenges such changes bring.

I believe I have just finished my first post for the Ultimate Blog Challenge – April 2019. I hope you’ll follow along with me as I discover 29 more posts worth sharing. The goal is to help us think about and be intentional in our marriage. Time passes so quickly. We must make the most of those relationships that are dearest to us. And who knows us better than our spouse? Let’s lean in and discover more together.

I hope you’ll join me.

Blessings to you, your spouse and your marriage.

This is my 1st post in the Ultimate Blog Challenge to post everyday during the month of April.

About Debi Walter

Tom and Debi have been sharing encouragements through their blogs for many years. Marriage, Reading God's Word and documenting family history is our focus. Growing in our relationship with the Lord is primary in all we say, write or do. We are grateful for all who desire to join us in the same endeavors.
This entry was posted in April 2019, Christian Marriage, Keeping It Real, Ultimate Blog Challenge and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

28 Responses to Confessions of a Marriage Blogger

  1. Sleepy says:
    April 1, 2019 at 6:58 am

    Have you ever thought about having like an online marriage group? Like a Facebook group but for marriages? Groups like that aren’t like marriage counseling but interesting questions and problems come up there which can give inspiration to posts. Also just letting people discuss marriage topics can help people deal with things they are going through. Specially for people like me who don’t have anywhere to go. We can’t speak with our families about our spouses,there isn’t anyone in church to talk to and finding a counselo can be difficult. It can even be difficult to talk with friends about certain things. I have found that talking to some random people who believe in Gods view of marriage has been helpful in my journey of becoming a better husband. I hav often gotten a new perspective on a situation in this way.
    So maybe that’s an idea.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. RAAckerman@Cerebrations.biz says:
    April 1, 2019 at 8:56 am

    About time you shared your words of wisdom with us once again. I look forward to the next 29 days!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. circa1959 says:
    April 1, 2019 at 9:00 am

    Enjoyed this and encouraging to me as I engage in the 30 day challenge. Looking forward to reading your posts.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. justjyll says:
    April 1, 2019 at 9:36 am

    You have accomplished a lot in 11 years of Blogging — impressive! I look forward to getting to know you through the Challenge!!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Andrew Budek-Schmeisser says:
    April 1, 2019 at 11:25 am

    I think you’ve done a terrific job, and that you bring new hope and horizons to many couples…and I suspect that sometimes when you feel the most ‘blah’ about what you’ve written, you’ve made the deepest impact.

    It’s worked that way on my blog, and it always surprised me.

    Also, if it’s any help, readership is never static. There will always be new faces.

    This morning I thought to quit
    ’cause in the night I nearly died.
    A voice said, “There’s no sense to it!”
    It’s the voice that’s always lied.
    The more I think to let it go,
    the harder I must push
    It all may hurt, I may be slow,
    but it’s Sydney or the bush.
    On every day’s thin gleam of hope
    I risk a fragile heart
    and though I’m on a fraying rope
    it’s not yet come apart.
    When the end comes I’d rather be
    still active, and not a memory.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Bonnie Anderson says:
    April 1, 2019 at 12:27 pm

    This is a great post for your #1 UBC. It gives an update, purpose, and friendly helpfulness that will bless those who read it.

    Liked by 3 people

  7. Jeanine Byers says:
    April 1, 2019 at 2:32 pm

    Wow, those are a lot of changes in the past ten years! I understand what you’re saying about wanting to make sure your posts are inspired. What a neat organization to have started, for Christian marriage bloggers.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Debi Walter says:
      April 1, 2019 at 2:34 pm

      Yes, It was quite the privilege to participate, Jeanine. It helps me to process all the changes by writing, so I’m excited to be in this UBC. Thanks for stopping by and even more so for commenting.
      Blessings,
      Debi

      Like

  8. Michael and Joya says:
    April 1, 2019 at 5:09 pm

    This is so wonderful! We started our blog a year ago and we after a year of our Christian remarriage we are still trying to get settled. But this is so inspiring and gives us great hope! THANK YOU! https://marriedstrong.com/about-joya-and-michael/

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Alana Mautone (@RamblinGarden) says:
    April 1, 2019 at 5:56 pm

    I wish you the best of luck with the UBC, and encourage you to keep in mind that you are constantly growing and changing, and so is your audience. Just think of the women’s magazines that have the same type posts month after month. Because you are growing, your take on things will always be a little different and you are also growing in wisdom.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Markus says:
    April 1, 2019 at 10:11 pm

    I know that I’m counter-cultural, but I would much rather follow a blog that posts awesome stuff occasionally, like yours! Honestly, I am often disheartened by some *other* marriage bloggers that are quite obviously trying all of the social media tricks to increase readership, followers, and engagement (which can be with a good motive) and over time, you start to wonder if they’re really more concerned about making a living off their “ministry”, especially when they don’t even respond to comments on their posts – the very ones they are “sponsoring” on FB.

    Thank You for not being one of “them”. Keep up the good work — I almost always enjoy and/or benefit from your posts! My only suggestion would be that you figure out how to post the entire text of your blog posts to FB, so that I don’t have to click through to your website. It’s a small inconvenience though!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Debi Walter says:
      April 2, 2019 at 7:03 am

      Markus, thank you for your honest feedback. Writing about something so important to us personally is what compels is to continue. It isn’t just a “our ministry”, which that term alone has bothered us. We are the church building up the church at large to equip their marriages to be the best they can be for God’s glory. Our pleasure in it is a benefit of it, not the focus of it.
      As to the partial posts on FB? I have done that in order to know if people are reading the post. If they click over to finish it then it tells me that the post was worth it to them. I hate for it to be an inconvenience to you and others though. I’ll ask the question on FB and get the feedback of others. Maybe I’ll make that change if enough feel the same as you.
      Again, thank you for commenting. We value every one and yours is encouraging and helpful.
      Blessings,
      Tom and Debi

      Like

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  12. Vanessa Marks says:
    April 2, 2019 at 8:47 am

    I have been following your blog for years and I think this is my first comment to you. I started a marriage ministry in my community years ago. You have helped me on this journey more than you can imagine and have connected me with some imaging people. KEEP UP THE GOD KIND OF WORK. Blessings to you and your family.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Debi Walter says:
      April 2, 2019 at 8:55 am

      Vanessa, that’s wonderful!! All of us doing our small part makes a huge difference in our communities. The fact that we have helped you brings us such gratefulness to God for what He has done. Thank you for commenting. It helps fuel our passion to keep going.
      Blessings,
      Debi

      Like

  13. Renel A. says:
    May 27, 2019 at 5:21 am

    When God speaks and gives me an idea for a post, I’m right there, ready to pound the keys with passion. But when He is silent, and I’m left to come up with ideas on my own, it can seem redundant.

    I feel you right there!! First time to stumble upon your blog. I love it. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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