Choices and Voices

Choices. We make them everyday. But are they good for your marriage?

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

Choices. We make them everyday, all day long!

What motivates the choices we make? Now that’s a question worth considering.

Today Tom and I had another one of those moments that we don’t like. It was not that big a deal, except it was. {sigh}

He said something loud because he thought I was farther away than I was. So I said something back louder wanting to know why he was talking so loud. He couldn’t hear me so he said something louder. (I know, it sounds ridiculous, but the tension was real!)

Normally, we would have laughed it off. But not this time. It just wasn’t funny. I was irritated and so was he.  However, we did make a choice…

We chose to talk about it.

This made all the difference in what happened next. Our day went on as planned. It didn’t ruin anything.

All couples have moments like these. We can’t avoid them, nor should we. You read that right! We learn much about ourselves and our spouse when we let our guards down. It is good for us to remember that there is still work to do, even after 40 years together. There is no easy road in marriage. We know that. We teach that. We remind others of that. But communication on the rocky road is necessary, even for us, to find the way out of the danger zone.

Choices and voices matter.

Emotional Intimacy Prompt: What choices are you currently making in your marriage? Are they navigating you to a safe place or deeper into the danger zone? What motivates those choices? Talk about it!


About Debi Walter

Face it, marriage is hard work. But when cultivated daily the fruit produced will satisfy for a lifetime. We're here to help with ideas and encouragement along the way. Having been married 40 years and counting, we share what we've learned with practical tips, Biblical Truths, Date night ideas to help you plow your own vineyard for God's glory.
This entry was posted in Christian Marriage, communication, Conflict, Encouraging Your Spouse, Growing Strong Marriages, Keeping It Real and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Choices and Voices

  1. Vickie says:

    Great reminder for us all. We, too, have been married 40 yrs and we had some “intense fellowship” this week and talked it out. I just wish we would remember that when it first starts, to stop and pray together and invite Jesus into our “intense fellowship”. I know it would make it less “intense” and also help us talk it through faster and gentler. All our marriages are “under construction” and “God isn’t finished with any of us yet.” May God be glorified through our marriages. Blessings to you, Debi, and Tom.


  2. The choice that I am making
    is not to share my day.
    ‘Tis a sad undertaking,
    but I must soon away.
    My time is wreathed in hollow flame
    and bound by cancer’s steel;
    so much of life is boundless pain
    that I would not fain reveal.
    But in uneasy harmony
    there is bright joy at hand,
    and no tongue for the mystery
    of this undiscovered land.
    I choose, therefore, to hold apart,
    but offer, still, a listening heart.

    Liked by 1 person

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