I had the privilege recently of hearing Gary Thomas speak at our church. I have always enjoyed his writing, and I discovered that he preaches in the same manner as he writes. It was inspiring and motivating. Below is an excerpt from his devotional book titled: Devotions For Sacred Marriage. We don’t own this book, but after reading this excellent first chapter, we’re compelled to buy it.
Are you a God-centered spouse or a spouse-centered spouse? A spouse-centered spouse acts nicely towards her husband when he acts nicely towards her. She is accommodating, as long as her husband pays her attention. A spouse-centered husband will go out of his way for his wife, as long as she remains agreeable and affectionate. He’ll romance her as long as he feels rewarded for doing so.
But Paul tells us we are to perfect holiness out of reverence for God. Since God is always worthy to be revered, we are always called to holiness; we are always called to love. A God-centered spouse feels more motivated by his or her commitment to God than by whatever response a spouse may give.
(To read more from this excellent chapter, simply click here and scroll down to the PDF link)
So, which is it? Are you motivated to be romantic only when your spouse is romantic in return? Or do you love your spouse wholeheartedly because this is how Christ has loved us? If this is an area in which you have struggled, may we encourage you to start praying for God to help you change? He is the only One who can help us change for His glory. We make the commitment to change, but He does the work. What a God we serve! This alone should cause our hearts to focus on Him in love and adoration – love towards our spouse will naturally follow.
Let God-centered romance begin…