We are attending a conference this weekend by C.C.E.F (Christian Counseling Educational Foundation), a group committed to helping Christians learn how to both receive and give biblical counsel.  We have had the privilege several times to attend these seminars, and we are always challenged, motivated and most of all encouraged in our relationship.

The title – Sex Matters – reveals the featured topic, and although we haven’t addressed it much on our site, we thank God for the very special gift sex is!  I have always held the belief that sex is a barometer in marriage – it usually isn’t the problem itself, but reveals the relationship is off in one or more other areas.

Sex is usually the first thing to be affected when there is stress or unresolved conflict between husband and wife.  Think about it – who feels romantically inclined when you’re stewing over unkind words or actions?  It shouldn’t be used as punishment intentionally, but often we do it anyway.  We roll over in bed giving huge “beware” signals by our silence.

How can we change?  By keeping a short record of wrongs suffered.  Be quick to acknowledge how you have neglected or hurt your spouse.  Be humble and willing to listen to their point of view.  Once you begin to practice communicating this way, you will soon discover sex really does matter, and so do all the other ways we communicate.

Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/people/lukegilkerson/

Winston Smith is one of the biblical counselors with CCEF, and below is a video we want to share with you where he answers the question: Am I obligated to have sex whenever my spouse wants? It is less than five minutes and definitely worth your time! Before you do, however, won’t you take a moment to consider how you would answer this question?  His answer may or may not match yours.  But one thing is for sure –  his answer will be based on biblical truth.