We’ve been absent the last couple of weeks. We had two hurricanes, a daughter healing from a c-section, a newborn granddaughter and sweet Elias to help care for. But we must say, you have all been on our mind.

This last hurricane—Milton—left in his path our coolest temps since April. It was a blessing to have fall weather while we cleaned up from another storm.

We couldn’t help but apply this to our marriage.

Whenever we have faced a storm of winds and floods in our relationship it’s the cool weather that helps us take a deep breath and do the work needed.

The question is, “From where does the cool wind come?”

We believe it is Grace.

If we answer conflict with more animosity the storm just builds.

The Bible says…

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭15‬:‭1‬ ‭ESV‬‬

You see when two high pressure systems collide, catastrophes occur like what happened in Western North Carolina. There is no end to the destruction that ensues. It is heartbreaking.

But when the cool air of grace is applied we are able to slow down and talk about what happened.

Grace is looking at your spouse with understanding not accusation. It’s slowing down to listen and learn.

Have you ever considered that arguments are the best growing opportunity a marriage has?

This is where pretense is shelved and truth is examined. That is if you’re both being honest and committed to change for the good of the marriage.

We have seen spouses who refuse to own any of the blame. They are finger-pointers with daggers that kill intimacy.

We drove today to our favorite beach. It has taken a beating the last few years, and Milton only made things worse.

I pray we can learn the lesson of extending grace following a storm. The tides come and go, but we have the choice to increase the heat that causes erosion, or breathe the fresh air of grace.

Let’s choose grace!

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Welcome to our new followers. We are so happy you are making the choice to build a stronger marriage. Troubles come, but how we handle them makes all the difference.

Have a blessed week,

Tom and Debi