I’m A Better Me Because Of We

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This is the week we celebrate our 38th wedding anniversary. It’s full of memories, thanksgivings, laughter and just plain gratefulness to God for allowing us to travel this far together.

Last week we were talking with a shoe salesman and the conversation came up about marriage. That happens often, probably because we’re looking for ways to draw people out regarding their own relationships. 

Here’s how our conversation went…

Tom: We’re about to celebrate 38 years of marriage.

Salesman: For real?

Me: Yeah, he’s had five wives, but only one marriage.

Salesman: (Does a double take) Huh? Oh, I get it! (Laughing, but not sure)

Tom: My wife isn’t the same woman she was when I married her. And I’m not the same either. We have to keep falling in love with the person he/she has become in order to keep our marriage strong and growing.

Salesman: Wow. That’s so good. Thanks for sharing that!

We found out our salesman wasn’t married, but hopefully we planted a seed for his future. 

Conversations like these happen frequently. Our prayer is that our words and our example will infuse hope that a life-long marriage is possible by and through the grace of God. 

Tom loved our Valentine’s weekend, and I’m sure whatever Tom has planned for us this weekend will be just as special. 

Our pastor says often, “Constant change is here to stay.” And marriage is no exception. Plan for the changes and they won’t take you by surprise.

I have concluded that I’m a better me because of the daily input of Tom’s love, care and wisdom. This is why I’ve changed and I pray it’s been for the better.

As Glenda sings in my favorite Broadway production, Wicked, “I have been changed for good!”

In what ways have you changed for good throughout your marriage?

About Debi Walter

Face it, marriage is hard work. But when cultivated daily the fruit produced will satisfy for a lifetime. We're here to help with ideas and encouragement along the way. Having been married 36 years and counting, we share what we've learned with practical tips, Biblical Truths, Date night ideas to help you plow your own vineyard for God's glory.
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7 Responses to I’m A Better Me Because Of We

  1. leslie976 says:

    Hi Debbie, 38 years! Wow! That’s great! I enjoyed reading! Marriage brings a lot of good changes for sure. They aren’t easy though! I love your title because it is so true! “I’m a Better Me Because of We.”

    • Debi Walter says:

      Thank you Leslie. I don’t think that couples realize starting out they will change and their love has to adjust to the changes in order to keep their marriage growing. Hmmm, I just realized it’s like a tree putting down roots. Each separate root provides stability for the tree as it grows taller to keep it from falling. Thanks so much for commenting. Have a blessed day!
      Debi

      • leslie976 says:

        Debi, So very true and something I personally had to learn after I got married. Adjustment is absolutely necessary. I love your analogy about the tree roots!

  2. CONGRATULATIONS!!! I’m (we’re –Cindy and Steve) so happy for you and Tom. 38 years and counting is a great number. May you be blessed with many, many more fruitful, loving, growing, and blessed years of marriage. You are a wonderful example of marriage partnership in Christ to so many. I love what you said, “I’m a better me because of the daily input of Tom’s love, care and wisdom. This is why I’ve changed and I pray it’s been for the better.” That’s so, so true. I can see that it is for the better. And it’s true for Tom too. I have no doubt that he is a better man because of you. You have both helped each other grow in many, many ways. And we all benefit from your growth. May you continue to grow in the Lord, in love with each other for many, many years. 🙂

  3. Ugochi says:

    Marriage has changed me. In fact, I think God uses marriage most often to change us into the persons we ought to be.
    Before I got married I was a perfectionist, which of course was a way to seek acceptance because I thought I had to be in certain way and do certain things to gain love…
    Fast forward today from almost 17 years, I have learnt to relax and not stress my husband about silly things like keeping the cup at the very exact same spot I kept it. And my children do not find me as cranky and irritable as I used to be when I had to waste all my energy being perfect and little energy to play with them.
    Congratulations Debi! God grant you and Tom forever bliss!
    Love

    • Debi Walter says:

      Ugochi,
      Thank you so much for sharing your story honestly. We all have our areas that God uses our spouse to either sharpen us or soften us. The key is to see this as a blessing instead of a conflict. Congrats on discovering this in 17 years of marriage!
      Blessings,
      Debi

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