A Marriage Many Will Never Know

Photo of Keith Urban listening to Kelly Clarkson’s riveting performance of Piece by Piece on American Idol

You may have heard the news about Kelly Clarkson and her husband, Brandon Blackstock, divorcing. She filed for a divorce following the quarantine stating irreconcilable differences. It’s a known fact that celebrities have a harder time keeping the knot tied and this one is surprising and heartbreaking to me.

I’ll never forget hearing her sing her then debut song, Piece by Piece, on American Idol’s finale. She was about 8 months pregnant and couldn’t hide her emotions about the testimony this song portrayed of her life growing up. It was riveting. There wasn’t a dry eye in the audience, nor in my living room. I was thrilled for her that she seemed so happy to have found a lifelong love. Until she wasn’t…

Marriage is hard work. And the quarantine magnified this truth. Being together day after day reveals areas in need of attention, and for some it may seem too difficult to climb that mountain. But what if Kelly and Brandon chose to work on their differences instead of abandon their vows? It was said that she wanted more children and he did not. This was a source of great disappointment and grief for Kelly. This is why we encourage engaged couples to have these conversations before marriage. How many children? How will they be disciplined? How will we spend or save our money? Etc…

I’m sad for Kelly and Brandon. And I’m sad for their children who will now divide their time between two households. But I’m mostly sad for the marriage they will never know.

Imagine…

  • …If they had committed to love and cherish each other until death parted them.
  • …If a deeper joy was waiting for them on the other side of this struggle.
  • …If they were able to find a compromise on the issues which separated them.

I believe there are rarely irreconcilable l differences, only one or both spouses not willing to give up their desires for the good of the marriage.

Of course, I’m not talking about abusive relationships; if you find yourself being physically, verbally or emotionally abused please seek safety and counsel. What I am talking primarily about are couples who give up too soon without giving the marriage a chance to grow and mature beyond the “this is what I want out of marriage and if I don’t get it, I’m leaving” stage. We all face that moment when the marriage moves to a deeper level and it isn’t fun, but it is good!

Sadly there are those who miss out on a good marriage they will never know because they quit too early. This is why we do what we do; We want to help marriages make it for a lifetime.

Do you remember a time in your marriage when it went from the honeymoon stage to the life just got serious stage? How did you and your spouse work through those differences? Were you in a better place afterward? We’d love to hear your story…

About Debi Walter

Face it, marriage is hard work. But when cultivated daily the fruit produced will satisfy for a lifetime. We're here to help with ideas and encouragement along the way. Having been married 40 years and counting, we share what we've learned with practical tips, Biblical Truths, Date night ideas to help you plow your own vineyard for God's glory.
This entry was posted in Christian Marriage, Difficulty, Testimonies, Troubled Marriage and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to A Marriage Many Will Never Know

  1. Mike Moran says:

    While preparing to wed a new couple recently, I heard a new song come into my heart. The song had not heard before by me. I asked where it came from.  He said, “It was written in heaven and it is their song!”. He has been excitingly waiting for their time together with a new song. He has been waiting for each of our times! Some people are very fruitful in building beautiful legacies (friends, marriages , families, etc.), others do not. Burying their gifted talents and possibilities in life. That’s when we need to reset to the best ‘way’.
     

    Like

  2. Sorry to be late. New tumour, it’s bleeding. Not fun.

    It could have been much better,
    and could have been way worse,
    but in reading back time’s letter
    our marriage ain’t a curse.
    When we met I really thought
    that I could be another man,
    one whom to the table brounght
    the shining blood of Holy Lamb.
    But I discovered I’m not Christ,
    and now I plainly see
    the things I should have sacrificed
    but held back, just for me.
    Perhaps she also had this goal,
    but we can only be what we control.

    Like

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