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Tom and Debi
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Category Archives: Troubled Marriage
The Best Thing You Can Do To Make Your Marriage Better Right Now
How is your marriage? Are you experiencing what we call a high-high? Or a low-low? Maybe you find your marriage somewhere in between. Wherever your marriage currently lies, the best thing you can do has nothing to do with the … Continue reading
Five Friday Favorites – Difficult Topics in Marriage
So often in marriage the way the enemy works against us it to make us uncomfortable talking about important topics. The only way to counter this attack is to do the difficult thing and talk about them. We are privileged … Continue reading
The Fine Line Between “We” and “Me”
It has happened more times than I can count since Tom and I have been married. We hear of another couple ending their marriage and it breaks our heart. Not only for the failure to keep their covenant before God … Continue reading
Are You Hangry?
Hangry is a combination of two words–hungry and angry. Anger often has the same appetite of hunger. It craves what it doesn’t have and results in a harsh outburst. Ugly. James 4 says, “1What causes quarrels and what causes fights … Continue reading
Do You Struggle With This In Your Marriage?
Today is Tax Day in America. It is the day we all must pay our dues to the government whether we like it or not. If they have taken too much from us during the year, it is a time … Continue reading
If My Spouse Would Just…
Photo by Priscilla Du Perez on Unsplash How would you finish this title? “If my spouse would just…” If you have an immediate answer that involves something they need to do to change, it’s likely you have some unresolved conflict … Continue reading
Tale of Two Conversations – The Choice Is Yours
Conversation #1 – Something was weighing on my mind. It was concerning something in our marriage, and I had been dwelling on it long enough to make me discouraged. It grew larger in my thoughts as each day passed. I … Continue reading
Defining Disappointments in Marriage
“If we have a misunderstanding of God we will most certainly have a wrong understanding of our circumstances.” – Lysa Terkeurst Marriage is hard. It takes a life-long commitment to pursue each other regardless of the circumstances we face. We … Continue reading
What We Didn’t Know Going In To Our Marriage
When we said our marriage vows we had no idea of what lay ahead of us. We didn’t know… In our first year we would move to the one city neither of us wanted to live. I would face health … Continue reading
A Closer Look at What Bores You
Living life with the same person becomes familiar as it should over time. But when the familiar becomes boring this can be the sign there is something else at play. Jon Bloom wrote an excellent article on the Desiring God … Continue reading
My Marriage Is Mediocre—Now What?
In our last post we shared 11 possible indicators your marriage might be mediocre. Today we want to offer some practical tips to help get you out of this trap. As a reminder here is our list: Your life revolves … Continue reading
11 Possible Indicators You Have A Mediocre Marriage
MEDIOCRE. Just the sound of it is blah, don’t you think? I looked up the definition and found this interesting… One of the things that is remarkable about mediocre is the extent to which it has retained its meaning over … Continue reading
Indescribable
Being a native Floridian, I have always loved watching storms roll in from a distance. Our skies are big making it easy to see when a storm is brewing. Hurricanes are the most powerful storms I’ve witnessed, and Irma is … Continue reading
What Diving In A Green Pool Reveals About Marriage
As most of you have probably witnessed the Olympic Divers have had quite an unusual distraction, at least for athletes of their ability. They have had to dive into a murky, green pool. They have had to trust that the … Continue reading
“It’s Not What I Thought It Would Be!”
All marriages at some point come to this conclusion. You never expected it to look like this, and how did you get here in the first place? It’s certainly not what you thought it would be. Where’s the romance? Where’s … Continue reading
Red Lights, Green Lights, And Smoke Screens
Our marriage community group is going through a book and DVD series titled, Grace-Filled Marriage, by Tim and Darcy Kimmel. In our last session the topic was Grace-Filled Sex, and he told a story I’d like to share with you, paraphrased … Continue reading
The Discouragement Of Besetting Sin
Our pastor shared something recently that has stuck with me. It’s regarding the idea that we are called as Christians to crucify the flesh with all its passions. While most well-taught Christians get this, we don’t all go after our … Continue reading
Anger Crouching At The Door
Anger. It crouches at the door of marriage and seeks a way to attack. If we’re not aware of its intent, we could be assaulted without knowing what hit us until the damage has been done. It’s claws come in … Continue reading
Trials In Marriage – Loving The Addict
Last week we talked to those who are caught in the web of addictions. This week we want to talk about the spouse married to the addict. This is a tough one because the trial you find yourself in often … Continue reading
Trials In Marriage – Addictions
“For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.” – Galatians 5:1 ESV My purpose in highlighting this particular trial is not to bring condemnation to those caught in this vicious cycle. Addictions are … Continue reading
