I remember when my kids used to say this to me all the time. I countered their whining with, “if you’re bored, then I’ll give you more chores to fill your time.” They learned not to say that anymore. But it still didn’t change the fact that they were bored. They just wouldn’t tell me because they really didn’t want to work either. 😉
We can do this in our marriage, especially after a year or two. Routine sets in, and we can lose intentionality in our relationship. We want to spend time talking about the different aspects of boredom in marriage and what it can actually be revealing for the good of our marriages. That’s right, there is a redeeming aspect of being bored, and God is waiting for us to ask Him for the wisdom to see it.
Boredom can be defined as the state of being weary and restless through lack of interest.
This is why we can have plenty to do and still be bored. It’s not a lack of things to do but a lack of interest it what it is you’re doing.
Let’s consider one aspect of boredom found in marriage–being bored with our job either outside the home or inside the home.
We most likely have lots to do, but there isn’t joy to be found in doing it. This could be caused by many things. We must take time when we feel bored with our job to pause and ask God what this is revealing about our heart, instead of seeking to fill the void the boredom has created. He will answer such a prayer and help us see what is at the root of our boredom.
From Gary Thomas’ book, Seeking The Face Of God, he says:
Pascal said the boredom that drives us to diversion could be the catalyst that calls us to change–if only we were not afraid to do the necessary work. (page 107)
It is Monday. It is a day that many in the work place dread. Songs have heralded the message that “Monday’s always get me down!” Is boredom always an indicator that something is amiss? Certainly not, but it could be. And the only way to find out is to ask the One who knows.
It takes great courage to confront these demons of boredom and fear. They need merely to show their faces and we tend to dutifully lapse into unceasing activity to escape them…we must push through fear and boredom if we are to seek the face of God. (page 108)
If you are finding yourself bored with your current responsibilities, ask God the following:
- Am I where you want me to be? Or are you calling me to change jobs and/or responsibilities?
- What is the one thing I would rather be doing?
- Is it possible that this other “thing” has become an idol and has a stronger pull on my heart than You would want?
- What Scriptures speak to this idol in my heart and could help set me free?
Know that God is faithful to complete the work He’s begun in all of us. We don’t have to be afraid to ask such questions, because God has promised to help us change as we cry out to Him. And the best news is–He will provide the grace to do it.
Have you considered boredom as being a possible indicator that can be used by God to reveal needed change in your heart? How could boredom help you in your growth in godliness? Spend time talking with your spouse about it.