Part 1 – I’m Exhausted

It’s amazing how much energy is required to raise a family, yet with each baby that’s born time doesn’t slow down. It marches on whether you’re in step or not. How can a couple continue to make the most of their marriage relationship when their children demand so much so much of the time. It would be easy to give up.

This is why we’re focusing an entire week on this topic. Our prayer is that you’ll actually have time to read our posts. We promise to make our ideas quick to read, easy to implement and with no guilt attached.

Part 1 – I’m Exhausted

Having babies, nursing babies, potty training toddlers and disciplining young children take a lot of commitment and hard work. It is part of the job parents must embrace from life’s first cry. For those who aren’t prepared for the work, it can leave your relationship on the back burner where romance can quickly cool.

How do you keep the romance alive without neglecting your children? We believe it’s not as difficult as it sounds. The key is kindness. Be aware of the needs your spouse has each day, and do all in your power to treat them kindly offering to help if possible.

Husbands of Exhausted Wives:

  • Offer to take the kids so your wife can do whatever she wants, sleep, shop, cook, etc. The idea is to give her time to enjoy the quiet.
  • Clean the kitchen for her or another household chore she dreads doing, or just hasn’t had time to get to.
  • Take the nighttime duty for her one night so she can get a full night’s sleep.
  • Comfort her by listening and understanding her frustrations. Don’t be quick to offer a solution either. Many times she isn’t looking for an answer–just someone to understand her struggle.
  • Don’t lead the conversation or reply by saying, “if you would only do…” This is guaranteed to be received in the wrong way. When your wife is exhausted is not the time to address an area in need of improvement, unless of course, you’re willing to do it for her for a season.
  • Take the lead in dealing with unruly children and handling the discipline when you’re around. If your wife stays at home all day with the children she has been doing this for hours. Not only will you bless your wife, but your children will benefit from having your involvement.

Wives of Exhausted Husbands:

  •  Give your husband time to be alone when he comes home from work. Make it a set amount of time–say, 30 minutes, so he can readjust his focus from work to home.
  • Welcome him home each night by teaching the children to anticipate Daddy’s home!
  • If a neat and clean house is appreciated by him, make sure the main room and your bedroom is in order when he comes home.
  • Do one of his chores for him.
  • Make his favorite meal so he smells it when he walks in the door.
  • Give him a night out with the guys.

But what about when you’re BOTH exhausted? We’ll talk about that tomorrow.

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This is post #17 in the Ultimate Blog Challenge to post everyday in July.

This entry was posted in communication, Conflict, Diapers, Toddlers & Romance, Oh My, Difficulty, Growing Strong Marriages, Hindrances to Romance, Parenting, Romance in Marriage and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Part 1 – I’m Exhausted

  1. Since I was/am/will always be? the night owl of the family, I was the one who provided the 2 and 4 am (as they aged- the 3 am) feedings. It’s also why my kids knew the Charlie Rose show theme song (since he was CBS News overnight way back then…)


    • Debi Walter says:

      What an example, Roy. Thanks for sharing. And btw, I’m glad you told me you commented because for some reason your past two comments went to my spam filter.


  2. theoddcoupleblogcom says:

    When our kids where little I lived for Friday nights! Hubby would bring home pizza so I didn’t have to cook and I got to go to bed whenever I wanted and sleep the whole night. (Actually he probably couldn’t of waken me if he tried.) He did bath time on his own, he put them to bed by himself & got up with them. They loved Saturday morning breakfast when they got old enough to have panny cakes that daddy made. My kids have an awesome dad!


  3. My husband has all your suggestions down perfectly! He’s pretty awesome and I can definitely say it has helped us to keep our marriage a priority. In a lot of ways, having kids is a way for both husbands and wives to grow by serving each other.


    • Debi Walter says:

      You’re right on, Elizabeth. We grow more when raising children than in any other season, but the key it to cooperate with what God wants to teach us. What a blessing you and your husband have discovered the balance. Thanks for sharing,


  4. Kristy says:

    Thanks for the tip of cleaning the bedroom as well. Coming home to a clean house is a priority for him and I often focus on the living room/kitchen. Our bedroom then becomes the dumping ground from the excess in the living room/kitchen!


  5. Pingback: Sample Saturday | Homekeeping Adventures

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