Fairytale or Adventure

Posted on February 12, 2024 by Debi Walter

Tom and I are watching The Crown on Netflix.

We started it a long time ago, but never finished it; our life demanded our attention elsewhere. In fact we forgot about it until our pastor mentioned it one recent Sunday.

The latest episode we watched in Season 4 is titled,

Fairytale—story of Charles and Diana’s courtship and marriage.

We didn’t know they had only seen each other 13 times before they married. I was shocked, until I realized Tom and I also dated only 12 weeks until we were engaged. We lived 2.5 hours apart, so our dates were limited.

We joked that after the wedding is when our dating really began. And for us, by God’s grace, it worked.

Like Diana I was scared of the unknown life ahead of me. I was still a teenager (19) and naive. I was homesick for the familiar, since I moved away from friends and family. I hardly knew Tom. But unlike Diana, I had a husband whose intentions and love for me were sincere.

The media created a reality of their own.

They desperately wanted the heir to the throne to find a wife. One whom the country could love and embrace as their Queen one day.

Yet they ignored the most important fact; to have what they hoped for it would have to be real.

Fairytales aren’t real.

As we watched the trauma of Diana’s story I was heartbroken for the many marriages her story represents. Heartache caused by neglect or unfaithfulness is hard to heal. But God is able to do the impossible if both are willing to do the hard work necessary.

At the close of the episode, the archbishop presiding over the ceremony said these words…

“Here is the stuff of which fairy tales are made. A prince and princess on their wedding day. But fairytales usually end at this point with the simple phrase, ‘They lived happily ever after.’

“As husband and wife live out their vows, loving and cherishing one another, sharing life’s splendors and miseries, achievements and setbacks, they will be transformed in the process. Our (Christian) faith sees the wedding day not as the place of arrival, but the place where the adventure really begins.”

The Crown – Archbishop Robert Runcie

This is why we do what we do—to encourage a reality in marriage where both husband and wife are loved and cherished for as long as they both shall live.

We’ll take the adventure over a fairytale; how about you?

Posted in Christian Marriage, Growing Strong Marriages | Tagged , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Foodie Fridays – St. Louis BBQ Ribs

Posted on February 9, 2024 by Debi Walter

My mouth is watering as I typed the title above.

We just got back from visiting our daughter for her birthday weekend. As is our tradition, we asked her what she wanted for her birthday dinner. Her response was, BBQ ribs.

We have a family favorite recipe of Baby Back Ribs, but Costco didn’t have any. Tom was considering the St. Louis ribs, which he’s never cooked. A lady saw him and said, I just made these and they were delicious. She went on the explain how she did it well enough that Tom bought them deciding to give it a try. I am so grateful for this lady pausing to share with him.

These ribs are probably the best we’ve ever had.

Instructions:

1. Prep St. Louis ribs by cleaning off the membranes. Check out this You Tube video on how to do it. It is a necessary step worth the time.

2. Use a good rub. We bought Kinders steak blend. After rubbing the ribs all over with Dijon mustard (so the seasonings stick), sprinkle a generous amount on the ribs, then set each rack in foil.

3. Pour a bit of apple cider vinegar over the ribs just to wet them. This acts as a tenderizer which makes them fall off the bone good.

4. Close the foil over the ribs, and place them in a pre-heated 250 degree oven for about 3 hours.

5. When the time is nearly finished, preheat your grill to medium high and place the ribs on to the grill to brown on both sides.

6. Turn down to low and place them on indirect heat for another 45 minutes to an hour.

7. For the last 35-40 minutes baste the ribs with BBQ sauce. We also used Kinders—highly recommend!

We served ours with twice stuffed potatoes and roasted Brussels sprouts with bacon and balsamic glaze.

This is now a new favorite. I haven’t been able to eat pork ribs for the last 5 years because they made me feel awful. I decided to take the risk and try them. I’m so happy to say I didn’t feel bad at all. Thank you, Lord!

You probably noticed we’ve just picked up blogging again. The Lord made it clear it’s time to start writing and sharing our lives to help couples glorify God in their marriage.

We’d appreciate it if you’d share our posts with your married or engaged friends, and a sincere welcome to those who have just found us.

Marriage is our passion and encouraging others to succeed is our ministry.

Be sure to sign up for emails so you don’t miss a post. Or you can follow us on Facebook or Instagram where on the following days we will have new posts and encouragement…

– Mondays we share about how to work on and maintain a healthy marriage. ❤️

– Wednesdays we share romantic ideas. 😘

– Fridays is our Foodie posts because, well—Tom and I love to cook and eat good food. 🥰

Have a great weekend and thanks for reading.

Posted in Christian Marriage, Foodie Fridays | Tagged , , | 4 Comments

Valentine’s Day Blessing

Posted on February 7, 2024 by Debi Walter

Driving home today was stressful as Interstate driving usually is. We saw truck drivers weaving in and out of lanes as if they were Nascar drivers. It was alarming and revealing. I’ve never paid attention to truck drivers—the ones who “stay in their lane”. But today I was grateful for them; they are usually conscientious about driving and drive by the rules.

Immediately I made a connection to my everyday life.

I thought of how many things my husband does for me that I don’t notice because he does it right without being asked.

Conviction set in.

What if I were to take notes for a week of all the things he does for me without being asked? I think it would bless him that I noticed.

“Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. Don’t mistake activity with achievement. The true test of a man’s character is what he does when no one is watching.”

Coach John Wooden

Valentine’s Day is one week away.

My challenge to you and me is to write down every day for the next week the things your spouse does for you that you would miss if they were gone.

Buy a special Valentine’s Day card and place your list inside. This will be a memory your spouse will remember.

And maybe wave at the truck drivers who drive well. We are all safer because of them.

Posted in Cherishing, Christian Marriage, Encouraging Your Spouse, Growing Strong Marriages, Romance in Marriage, Valentine's Day | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Learning Curve

Posted on February 5, 2024 by Debi Walter

Tom and I have been learning about difficult issues in marriage that we didn’t know happened. We realize how we have been spared many heartaches in our 45 years of marriage. Not that we didn’t have our own to deal with—we certainly did—but nothing on the level we have witnessed recently.

We have watched couples where one spouse refused to admit their wrong in the marriage, a major red flag.

We all bring sin to our marriage.

We shouldn’t be surprised when we hurt our spouse. The most important way to deal with it is to be quick to repent. Not just a token, “I’m sorry,” but a deep regret for the pain you’ve cause your spouse.

If you find yourself blame-shifting you may be missing a major part of a healthy marriage. We all must be quick to see our sin and own it. Only then do we find grace from God to change.

I can testify that my husband owned the blame when we faced our hardest tests early in our relationship. When I struggled to forgive him, he was quick to say he deserved it for the way he hurt me. He never blamed me for the way he treated me. He never said if you wouldn’t have done this I wouldn’t have sinned. Instead he realized his sin wasn’t about me at all. It was about him and his relationship to God.

What a liberating response for me to see. Even when Tom hurt me, I felt cared for by him in how he released me to grieve.

If your spouse is shifting the blame on you when they are at fault, please seek help.

This isn’t how healthy marriages relate to each other and certainly not modeling Christ in how He instructed us to love. Jesus laid down His life for us when He wasn’t at fault. How much more should we lay down our lives and our pride for our spouse? We vowed to love them above ourselves. This is easy to say on our wedding day, but impossible to do apart from the grace God supplies.

It breaks our heart to see the damage that occurs when one spouse refuses to humble themselves.

Pride kills a marriage. Humility fertilizes it.

All marriages face hard times. We all need God to help us through them. We pray our post will encourage and challenge you to keep leaning in to make your marriage the best it can be.

Posted in Christian Marriage, Difficulty, Forgiveness, Keeping It Real, Troubled Marriage | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Foodie Fridays – Groundhog’s Day Movie in a Muffin

Posted on February 2, 2024 by Debi Walter

February 2nd is Groundhog’s Day. The day when Puxatawney Phil predicts the weather for the rest of Winter.

The movie is a classic. The day repeats itself over and over again starting with breakfast at Tip Top Cafe’. Phil orders the usual: coffee, pancakes with maple syrup and bacon.

I did some research and found a recipe that combines all these flavors into a delicious muffin. I’m happy to say they are delicious!

Thank you, Marissa Bate of marissarothkopf.substack.com

What You’ll Need:


2 cups whole wheat flour (I used regular)
1 tablespoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup white sugar
1/2 cup butter
1 cup milk (2 percent or whole milk preferred)
1 large egg
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon maple extract
6 to 8 pieces of bacon, cooked and crumbled
OR
1 cup fresh or frozen (but not thawed) blueberries

What You’ll Do:

  1. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F. Grease a 12-hole muffin tin.
  2. In a small bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, salt and sugar.
  3. In a large microwave-safe bowl, melt the butter. Let the butter sit for 5 minutes to cool
    slightly before proceeding with the recipe.
  4. While whisking, add the milk in a slow stream until combined. Whisk in the egg and
    vanilla and maple extracts.
  5. Fold in the flour and the bacon (or blueberries) until just combined. Don’t overmix or the
    result will be bouncy muffins.
  6. Divide the batter evenly into the baking tin and bake for 18 to 20 minutes. Let the muffins cool for ten minutes in the pan before removing them to a rack to cool completely.
  7. Spread the glaze evenly over the tops or serve plain with butter and syrup.
    Maple-Coffee Glaze.
    What You’ll Need:
    1/4 cup butter
    2 tablespoons half-and-half or milk 2 tablespoons strong coffee
    2 tablespoons maple syrup
    optional: 1/2 teaspoon maple extract 1 cup confectioners’ sugar, sifted What You’ll Do:
  8. In a medium size microwavable bowl, melt the butter. Let the butter sit for 5 minutes to cool slightly before proceeding with the recipe.
  9. Into the butter, whisk in the half-and-half, coffee, maple syrup and extract until the mixture is creamy and uniform in color.
  10. Whisk in the confectioners’ sugar until blended and no lumps of sugar remain. Add more half-and-half as needed to create an easily spreadable consistency
  11. Enjoy over and over again.

Movies provide lots of ideas for romantic memories—whether food or activities.

What is a favorite movie your spouse enjoys? Why not plan a meal or an activity around it and see if they aren’t blessed.

Here’s to 6 more weeks of winter…I think I’ll have a another muffin!

Posted in Christian Marriage, Movie Dates | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Try Something New

Posted on January 31, 2024 by Debi Walter
@candlelightconcerts

How long has it been since you and your spouse tried something new together?

It can be anything—restaurant, recipe at home, romantic ideas or even a hobby or skill.

Your marriage relationship is unlike any other—you can try anything new. It may be a new favorite is waiting around the bend.

We have friends who started playing pickle ball together. Tom and I once took archery lessons, as well as gun training. we learned I’m a pretty good shot with a gun, but I didn’t like it. Archery was hard for both of us since we rarely use our fingers in that way. But we still made a memory.

We’ve been to cooking schools, Top Golf, candlelight concerts (this was just last week as shown in the picture at the top).

The longer we’re married the easier it is to slip into boring routines. The only way to fight it is to be intentional.

Here’s this week’s challenge: Plan something to do together that you’ve not done before. You can plan together or make it even better by surprising your spouse. Maybe the surprise itself is something you’ve never done.

Let’s make our marriages better and stronger this year by doing something new.

Posted in Christian Marriage, Growing Strong Marriages, Romance in Marriage, romancing your spouse, Romantic Ideas | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

When Marriage Needs a Reboot

Posted on January 29, 2024 by Debi Walter

My Smart Phone is only smart when it works. When it starts doing weird and unexplainable things, we’ve all learned it needs a reboot.

Marriage is no different.

We can know all the right things. We can even have years of success behind us. But when we get overextended or buried under stressful emotions, things don’t work like they should. Offenses are taken when they weren’t intended. Words are hard to find to explain why we did what we did. And worse we can falsely assume why our spouse did what they did or didn’t do. If these offenses are not dealt with a crash may be ahead.

Has this happened to you and your spouse?

It has to us. The last 4 years has brought us trauma and heartache such as we have never experienced in our 45 years of marriage. And worse we were both feeling the full blow. We were being assaulted from every direction and could hardly catch our breath, let alone find time to sort out the issues.

But finally by God’s grace, the Holy Spirit is breathing life into our hearts and marriage.

Once a phone is rebooted it works like new. That’s because the programmers built in the needed repair.

God has also built in us the ability to reboot our marriage.

It starts with repentance for sins committed against each other. No one is without sin, the Bible states. We all need to apologize from a sincere heart when we hurt our spouse. It is only then that God pours His rebooting grace all over our relationship.

The Bible also says, “He gives grace to the humble and opposes the proud.” Is your reboot not working? It may be you’re blaming the wrong person.

You see my phone can’t reboot itself if I’m blaming the problem on my husband’s phone. No, I have to admit my phone is at fault and turn it off to gain the proper perspective.

What do you need to turn off in your relationship? Is it sarcasm? A pointing finger? Maybe it’s a lack of empathy? Or worse critical judgments? Whatever it is, the Programmer of your heart knows what your marriage needs. Ask God and listen. It’s up to you to push the reboot button.

We are doing just that, and it feels good to reboot.

In our next post we’ll share ideas on what to do to move forward after a season of difficulty.

It also feels good to be writing again. I’ll share about that at some point, but for now let’s focus on breathing fresh perspectives into our marriage. It’s the most important relationship, after God, in this life.

Posted in Biblical Encouragement, Christian Marriage, Difficulty, Growing Strong Marriages, Repentance, Troubled Marriage | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Detour

Posted on January 26, 2024 by Debi Walter

Have you ever been on the way to a familiar place, so much so that you hardly paid attention to the drive? We do this most of our lives passing the same places for the same reasons. Until…a detour sign redirects your path.

An interruption for sure. They take longer and now you have to give full attention to the road ahead. Looking for the next sign hoping it takes you where you’re expecting to go.

Marriage can be this way. Even marriage blogs for that matter.

Today is normally our Foodie Fridays post, but today is a detour. Our Foodie Fridays started as a detour and has became the normal route for the last year and for reasons I can’t disclose.

Suffice it to say, God is teaching us new normals on this unexpected detour.

I have an internet friend who writes encouraging posts on her private Facebook page to young moms. She just experienced a detour we will all face at some point; her husband is facing a severe health crisis. All writing has stopped as her daughter updates the rest of us. I can only imagine the fear associated with this detour. Please pray for her and her husband.

Life brings us heartache.

This is what has slowed my writing down the last four years. Not because I don’t have anything to say, but because I don’t know how to say it rightly. What used to be easy, now takes more thought—and I haven’t had the energy to think that hard.

The road seems to be widening for the days ahead and for this I thank God. Tom and I have even started date nights again—ones that are planned for fun, not just because we need to eat.

I’ve heard it said that our ordinary days that seem mundane to us now will be the very days we will miss when our time together ends in this life.

Let’s celebrate the normal life God has given us. Even if they contain a few detours. It is worth the ride!

Have a great weekend.

Posted in Boredom, Christian Marriage, Dating Your Spouse, Death and Grieving, Growing Strong Marriages, Keeping It Real | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Foodie Fridays – A Family Favorite Game Day Snack

Posted on January 19, 2024 by Debi Walter

I had never had one until I met Tom. It was a weird looking vegetable, and I had no idea how to prepare it, much less how to eat it.

An artichoke is beautiful and unique and full of health benefits.

“Artichokes are frequently cited as a superfood, in part because of their high levels of antioxidants. Studies show a number of proven and potential health benefits of artichokes, [including much needed fiber].”

WebMD

Ok so what do you do with it?

First, cut the bottom stem off with a sharp knife to allow the artichoke to sit flat while stuffing.

Next, with kitchen shears snip off the tips of each leaf. Then wash well separating the leaves to rinse thoroughly. Drain upside down on a towel or rack while making the stuffing.

For the stuffing you’ll need equal parts of melted butter, Italian bread crumbs and Parmesan cheese. Mix all together until well blended.

Place artichoke in a shallow bowl or pan. Using a small spoon, place stuffing inside each leaf. Continue until all leaves are filled with this yumminess. Finally, place stuffing on the top and pack it down to give a nice pretty crust on top.

Repeat for every artichoke you’re making.

Steam artichokes for 30-40 minutes until the leaves pull off easily.

To eat, simply peel off a leaf and scrape the stuffing into your mouth. The artichoke has a bit of meat on the inside of each leaf. It is delicious.

But the best is yet to come…

After enjoying all the leaves you’ll be left with a soft pointy center which is actually the blossom of the plant. It is made of silky fibers that are inedible. Use a sharp paring knife to cut away this part from the bottom. You’ll have only the bottom “heart” of the choke left. This is worth all the work, I promise.

Pile the leftover stuffing onto the heart, sprinkle with salt and eat with a fork.

This is a fun appetizer to eat because it takes time. Perfect for a game day snack.

Posted in Christian Marriage, Foodie Fridays | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Foodie Fridays – Make Ahead Game Day Snacks

Posted on January 12, 2024 by Debi Walter
Dear friends

Have you ever met a friend who you just connected with over shared interests. And later became good friends as a result?

We have. Their names are Steve and Missi. We met at church and discovered we shared a love for comedy and writing. Our church helped facilitate the growth of our friendship by hosting an Annual Christmas Bash where we made fun of everything that had happened during the year.

The productions were big and well loved for the laughter and reflecting back on the shared life we had enjoyed together as a church. But even more fun was the planning, writing and rehearsing that began 9 months prior.

We did parodies, short skits and reenactments of well-loved shows like Star Trek, Andy Griffith, The Wizard of Oz and Brigadoon.

Those were such fun times for Tom and me.

It was a sad day when Steve and Missi moved to CO. for we knew it would mark the end of our lives together—at least how we had known it. We still traveled to see them, but the distance soon grew between us, but not our love.

Good friends are like that. It can be years where you don’t see each other, but when you do, you pick up right where you left off.

It was an even sadder day when we heard of Missi’s sudden death this past May. We were heartbroken and grieved for the loss Steve and their family would face.

All the laughter we had shared now turned to tears. While we are grateful she knew and loved Jesus, she leaves a big hole in the hearts of all who loved her; us included.

What does this have to do Foodie Fridays? Everything!

Missi (Steve too) was a great cook. I have several of her recipes and one we make often is today’s featured recipe.

Missi’s Black Bean Dip

Missi’s Black Bean Dip

Steve has given me permission to sbare it with you as we begin the countdown to the Super Bowl.

Ingredients:

  • 2 cans Progresso Black Beans, drained and rinsed
  • 2 blocks (8 ozs.) Neufchâtel cheese
  • Fresh bunch cilantro
  • 2-4 fresh jalapeños- seeded and minced
  • 1 bunch green onions (green part only)
  • 1/2 to 3/4 can Del Monte Fresh Cut tomatoes
  • Adobo to taste

Directions:

Combine all ingredients and stir together using a large spoon. when well combined, cover and refrigerate for at least 4 hours.

Serve with nacho chips.

——————

We hope you’ll try it, and if you do, say a prayer for Steve and their two boys. This kind of grieving lasts a lifetime, but thankfully it’s not without hope. I can only imagine how good the food is she’s cooking now.

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Surprise Challenge

Posted on January 9, 2024 by Debi Walter

Have you considered the blessing there is in surprise?

Our lives are normally predictable which can translate to boring. The longer you’ve been married the more likely your relationship is mundane or heading that way.

Our special needs 3 year old grandson loves to be surprised. He coils up with laughter whenever we do something unexpected. He can’t talk but the light in his eyes lets us know how much he loves to be surprised.

What about your spouse? Do they like special surprises? If you aren’t sure you need to ask. If you do know, then why not plan something little or even extravagant, based on your budget.

There is no one more worthy of your attention than the one to whom you said, “I do“.

It’s the start of a new year. Why not resolve to make plans to surprise your spouse every month in 2024. It might take some planning on your part, but it will bring lasting blessing to the one you’re called to love and cherish.

Some ideas include:

  • flowers
  • take a day off from work and let them know by showing up for a surprise lunch at home or at their work.
  • an unexpected snack hidden in their car for their commute to or from work
  • a Spotify playlist of all your favorites
  • dinner out
  • a surprise shopping spree
  • a coffee date
  • a daily text for a week at the same time of day with a funny, romantic or sexy quote or meme.
  • hide notes around the house for them to find throughout the week.

It doesn’t have to cost a lot of money, but the effort spent planning speaks volumes as to how you value your marriage.

Are you up for the challenge?

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Reclaiming Rest

Posted on January 7, 2024 by Debi Walter

When our kids were little, Sunday was stressful. Since we homeschooled our three kids, it was the only day of the week when we had to be somewhere on time. And my husband hated being late.

I remember once when Tom was ready, but the rest of us weren’t. Instead of helping me get the kids and their things together, he sat in the car, engine running, waiting for us to load. Yeah, he did that—once. Not only was it insensitive, it sent a message to our kids that it was my job to get everyone ready and out the door on time.

Tom has repented many times to me about this, which is why I love him. He is a kind man and empathetic, which makes him quick to repent and seek God’s grace to change.

The Bible says, “It is the grace of God that teaches us to say no to ungodliness.”

This goes both ways in marriage.

I must seek the log in my own eye before pointing out someone’s speck. And if I can’t remember a time when God revealed a log in me, then I’m the one deceived. For all of us have sinned and fall short of God’s glory.

Back to reclaiming rest.

It’s the humble heart that can rest because God’s love covers a multitude of sins. There is nothing I must do but respond to His conviction and repent.

This is where lasting change begins.

If one says, “it’s not me, it’s the wife or husband you gave me,” then I am repeating the very first sin from the Garden of Eden.

”And the Lord said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?” The man said, “The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate.” Then the Lord God said to the woman, “What is this that you have done?” The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.”

Genesis‬ ‭3‬:‭11‬-‭13‬ ‭ESV‬‬ (emphasis mine)

No one can make me sin. And if someone blames me for their sin, their fingers are pointing in the wrong direction. We are each responsible for the condition of our own heart.

Rest, true rest, comes from knowing Jesus and the forgiveness that His death and resurrection secured for us—freedom from sin. This is personal and something I’m clinging to today.

I pray your Sunday is filled with worship, Bible teaching, fellowship with like-minded believers and most of all rest.

Also—I’m praying we arrive on time. 🥰

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Foodie Fridays – Braciole

Posted on January 5, 2024 by Debi Walter

Tom is Italian. We love Italian food most of all for the warmth and comfort a good traditional meal provides.

When Tom’s Mom passed away, I was grateful she gave me her sauce recipe. It’s still our favorite Bolognese sauce and probably always will be.

Even with all our family favorite recipes, we still keep our ears opened to hear of new dishes we’ve yet to try. This year I heard about one from my life-long friend and hair stylist, Rose.

Her Mama is full-blooded Italian and every Christmas she makes Braciole, pronounced “bras-chee-ow-lay”—a flank steak pounded flat and layered with garlic, parsley and other herbs, garlic, pine nuts, Parmesan and Romano cheeses and more garlic. I added panko bread crumbs to help soak up the basil San Mariano tomato sauce. It did its job too. Once the layers are in place you roll it up roulade-style and secure with butchers twine. Sear them and place in the tomato sauce to cook in a slow oven for a couple of hours. Yum!

This is a time consuming process, but well worth it. I had Tom’s help and our friends who were staying with us for our traditional New Year’s Eve celebration. Our hands were all working so I have only a few photos of the night, but I’ll never forget the experience.

There are eight of us who have traveled the world together since 2007, when we first visited Spain, France and then took a Mediterranean cruise. We called it the trip of a lifetime, and it was. All of our lives changed considerably after this trip, yet we’ve managed to stay close even with one couple moving to another state.

In April we are going on our 2nd European trip, this time to Tuscany and Lake Como in Italy and then to Lake Lucerne in Switzerland. We planned to enjoy a good Italian dinner to ring in the new year in anticipation of this vacation.

We had such a great night. The food, the wine, the friendships and the words of gratefulness that we’re learning to not leave unsaid. It was a special night for us all.

Now for the recipe. It’s easiest to share the link so you have access to all the tips and photos. Let me know what you think if you give it a try.

What traditional recipes do you prepare over the holidays?

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Foodie Friday – New Year’s Traditional Meal

Posted on December 29, 2023 by Debi Walter

It is two days until 2024 and I always look forward to our New Year’s Day menu:

Hoppin’ John, Collard Greens and cornbread

Hoppin’ John is a southern dish that makes black-eyed peas exceptional. Sop it up with some cornbread and it will warm your soul.

It’s a simple dish really, just takes time to allow all the flavors to come together—like a hearty soup.

My Collards recipe is made with apples sliced in thin strips like fries, which I believe adds a sweetness to the greens. It’s so delicious!

I won’t make you wait any longer…

Hoppin’ John

2 c. dried black-eyed peas
1/2 lb. ham
2 qts. water
1 c. uncooked white rice
1 c. chopped onion
1 c. chopped celery
2 t. butter or margarine
1/2 – 1 t. Italian seasoning
1 t. sugar
2 t. salt
1/4 t. pepper

Sort and wash peas; place in a heavy saucepan. Cover with water, and bring to a boil; cook 2 minutes. Remove from heat. Cover and let soak for 1 hour, drain.

Combine ham and 2 qts. water in a large dutch oven. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer for 15 minutes.

Add peas; bring to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer 45 minutes. Add remaining ingredients; bring to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer an additional 30 minutes or until black-eyed peas are done. Remove ham; cut into small pieces. Stir ham into mixture.

Serves 8

Fried Collards with Apples and Bacon

INGREDIENTS:

2 lbs. Collard Greens, washed and cut in 1/4″ thick slices, tough center stalk removed
1/4 c. hot vegetable oil
1/2 c. chicken stock
1 tsp. salt
4 tsp. apple cider vinegar
1/2 tsp. dried crushed red pepper flakes
2 small Fuji apples, cored and sliced thin like matchsticks
4 slices bacon, cooked but not crisp and cut into fourths

DIRECTIONS:

Stir-fry collards in oil in large dutch oven over medium-high heat stirring often until wilted.
Add chicken broth, salt, apple cider vinegar and pepper flakes.
Stir-fry 3 minutes or until greens are crisp tender.
Gently stir in bacon and apples and cook stirring often until tender, about 2 minutes. Note: I like to simmer these longer on the stove for more tender greens. But both ways are delicious.

Food has always been Tom’s love language, so any food I make is to bless him. I hope it blesses your family—Happy New Year!

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Christmas Reflections

Posted on December 24, 2023 by Debi Walter

No matter how long you’ve been married, there is something special about pausing to remember.

Christmas provides a great opportunity to do so, since it happens the end of the year.

Our pastor always asks these questions in December, “Look back at where you were this time last year? How have you grown? How has your perspective changed? What challenges have you endured? What victories have you faced? What has made you happy or sad? And why?”

These are good questions to ponder together as a couple. We are on this journey of marriage for the purpose of growing in our relationship to the Father and reflecting that love in how we treat each other.

Our marriage is an expression of the love Jesus has for His church, His bride.

We encourage you to set aside some time after the kids are in bed. Sit together in the quiet with the lights flickering and talk about these things.

We often assume our spouse knows us so well we don’t have to tell them what we’re thinking, but this is an unfair assumption. Only the Holy Spirit knows the thoughts we have. Make this time a priority and see how God increases the intimacy you share as friends and lovers.

We will have a slow Christmas that’s a bit quieter than usual. Rather than feel sorry for the distance there is between us and most of our grandchildren, we will use this time to lean in and love each other well in this season. And we’ll have Elias to enjoy as he experiences this Christmas as a three year old without cancer-our biggest victory this year!

Merry Christmas!

Posted in Christian Marriage, Christmas, communication, Growing Strong Marriages, Intimacy | Tagged , , | 4 Comments

Foodie Fridays – Kahlua for “Youa” and a Cake to Bake

Posted on December 22, 2023 by Debi Walter

I haven’t made it in years, mainly because it makes so much—2 liters. But this year I was ready to make some as gifts and this time provide a recipe for Kahlua cake. Sweet!

I realize not everyone enjoys a White Russian Cocktail or a chocolate martini, so Kahlua cake is the perfect way to enjoy this gift without the alcohol.

Confession though—this is my first time baking this cake with a silky smooth ganache. I have never made ganache, pronounced “guh-nosh”, but it might be my new favorite chocolate creation. And Tom had a slice of this cake for breakfast which is always a good sign. After all, a Bundt cake is just a giant donut, right?

Homemade Kahlua

Ingredients:

  • 1 – 12 cup pot of very strong, Chocolate flavored coffee. I use Starbucks mocha coffee
  • One shot of strong espresso
  • 1 lb light brown sugar (you can use up the 2 lbs., but I prefer a less sweet Kahlua)
  • 4-6 T. Vanilla extract
  • 1 bottle 190 proof Clear Grain alcohol

Directions:

Bring brewed coffee to a boil in a Dutch oven or large pot. Gradually add the brown sugar and return to a boil stirring constantly. Let cool to room temperature.

When completely cool, add vanilla and alcohol. It’s ready to serve, no need for it to age. But the older it gets the better it is. There is no expiration date.

Pour into bottles of your choice.

Yields 2 liters (Recipe from Cooks.com but I’ve tweaked it enough to call it my own.)

And now for the amazing…

Kahlua Cake

Rather than type out the recipe, I’m sharing the link from Chew Out Loud blog. What a great name for a food blog. I have to give credit where it is due, and this cake is a new favorite. I may be making more Kahlua than usual just to make this dessert all year.

This would be a great addition to your New Year’s celebration, which is only a week away!

Merry Christmas from our table to yours.

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Foodie Friday – A Family Classic

Posted on December 8, 2023 by Debi Walter
1947 Vintage Cookbook

My Mom went home to be with her Savior 11 years ago next week at the age of 90. How I miss her. There is one recipe our family has made every Christmas since I was born, and maybe longer. I found the original in her Better Homes and Gardens cookbook from 1947–the year my parents were married.

I believe food has a way of touching those longing places in the heart like no other. You may have similar memories of foods that bring you comfort. When I smell these roasted pecans my mind is transported right back to my Mom’s kitchen.

Today I made my second batch of Sugared Pecans., just like Mom’s. Although in the original recipe, walnuts are used, here in the south pecans are the nut of choice.

If you’ve not seen one, pecan trees are huge with a large, tall canopy. My grandparents had one in their backyard between the orange grove and their house. I spent many a Christmas cracking the pecans hard outer shell with my grandfather’s nutcracker. Maybe that’s why I love pecans, they remind me of family.

Tom and I just drove through southern Alabama and Georgia where pecan orchards are; you can’t miss them. They stand at attention on either side of the road like sentinels, row after row on mission to keep our southern recipes alive.

I’m certain at every road side stand in the south one can find—pecan logs, pecan pralines, pecan pies, butter pecan ice cream or shelled pecans sold by the pound—It is a true Southern staple.

Today I’ll share with you our family recipe. They make great gifts or additions to your holiday charcuterie board. But be warned you may eat a pound as they’re cooling on the rack.

Sugared Pecans

While the water, sugar and cinnamon are heating do not stir. Set the timer for 15-20 minutes. To check for “soft-ball stage” take a little from the pot and put in a cup of cold water. When it holds together in a soft ball (not hard or not fall apart) you’ll know it’s time to add the vanilla then the pecans.

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Foodie Friday – Langostino Nachos

Posted on December 1, 2023 by Debi Walter

Years ago we were a part of a trial group testing out new recipes for a restaurant chain. We were paid for our opinion which made this a fun date night.

We had never heard of langostinos before and maybe you haven’t either. They are Scotland’s native prawn that taste oh so good!

For years we have duplicated this recipe using baby shrimp. When we recently discovered that our local Publix sells langostinos wild caught and frozen, we couldn’t wait to try it.

Obviously it was a success or it wouldn’t make it on our blog. Right now Publix has them on sale too if you’d like to try them.

Langostino Nachos

Ingredients:

  • 1 bag frozen langostinos
  • Mozzarella cheese, shredded
  • 1 jalapeño pepper, seeded and diced
  • 1 scallion, diced
  • Tortilla chips
  • Lemon, optional for garnish

Layer tortillas in baking sheet. Then cover with mozzarella cheese. Add jalapeno, then langostinos then green onions.

Bake at 350 for 8-10 minutes.

Serve hot, adding a squirt of lemon, if desired.

We love any nachos, but these take it to a new level. Let us know what you think.

Until next time…

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Roots Remain

Posted on November 15, 2023 by Debi Walter

Oak trees are beautiful. We moved into our neighborhood 31 years ago because of the mature oak trees. They provide much needed shade from our intense Florida heat.

Tom had a tree removed out of necessity in our front yard last month. It was the tree right outside my office window; the one I would stare at when writer’s block had me in its grip. It was also the on-ramp for the local squirrel population to access our roof.

But now it is gone. It was diseased and unsafe for the high winds we often have blow over us. It’s good that Tom no longer has to worry about a falling branch landing on our car or house.

Instead of staring at my tree this morning, I’m staring at the level ground where it once stood.

As I was caught in this mindless gaze, I heard a truth whispered to me that I’ve been pondering ever since…

Though the tree is gone, it’s roots remain.

The roots that provided nourishment and support through every storm and powerful hurricane. The roots that were also there as the first green shoots were breaking through the soil.

Healthy roots provide fruit.

In our lives, Tom and I have seen family members whom we love leave this life for the next. They once stood as a tall oak embracing whatever blew their way. They provided us direction, comfort and support when needed.

Though the tree is gone, their roots remain.

They whisper reminders, “My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭121‬:‭2‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Our marriage stands on strong roots, a tree planted in fertile ground. Although life has thrown us some difficult storms, we are still standing strong for God’s glory.

““But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.””
‭‭

Jeremiah 17:7-8

There is a song out now that has provided much needed encouragement to us.

Firm Foundation, by Cody Carnes

Christ is our firm foundation. The rock on which I stand. When everything around me is shaken, I’ve never been more glad.

That I put my faith in Jesus, ‘cause He’s never let me down. He’s faithful through generations. So why would He fail now?

He won’t!

This song has been our anthem in this season of loss and pain.

All marriages face hard times. The question is, how are your roots? Are they wrapped around Christ? He won’t fail. He won’t!

Posted in Biblical Encouragement, Christian Marriage, Difficulty, Growing Strong Marriages, Keeping It Real, Music, Worship | Tagged , , , , , | 5 Comments

Foodie Friday – Best of Vacation Food

Posted on October 27, 2023 by Debi Walter

We are on a much needed and anticipated vacation. Being from Florida the only Autumn beauty we encounter is store bought. This is why we decided to chase the leaves for two weeks in North Carolina and enjoy the cool air.

Town square, Burnsville, NC

Tom and I love trying new places and since we sold our cabin a year ago, “We are now free,” as Tom says, “to move about the country.”

We have had some amazing food. We found each restaurant using my Yelp app. These pictures say it all. I’ve listed the restaurant and location in case you’d like to visit one day.

Wondering if you can guess my favorite dish. I wanted it so badly that when I heard they were sold out on our first visit, we came back three days later so I could get it. Guess I’m comments. 🥰

Jay’s Original Fish and Chicken, Brunswick, GA
Pulled Pork at Old Hampton BBQ, Linville, NC
Philly Cheesesteak, Garden Deli, Burnsville, NC
Chicken Enchiladas, Las Salsas, Marion, NC
Mountain Trout BLT with Fried Green Tomatoes, Live Oak Gastropub, Spruce Pine, NC
Black and White soup with turmeric crema & salsa, Live Oak Gastropub, Spruce Pine, NC
Eggplant Parmesan, Vale 243 Southern Italian,
Clyde, NC
Garlic Knots & marinara, Vale 243 Southern Italian, Clyde, NC

So far we have had quite the culinary tour mixed with lots of fresh air and peak fall color. And we still have a week to go!

Chasing leaves is fun and so is finding the next good restaurant to try. Stay tuned…

Our porch view, Waynesville, NC
Posted in Christian Marriage, Foodie Fridays, Travel, Vacations | Tagged , , , , , , , | 4 Comments