Worship

Posted on March 10, 2025 by Debi Walter

Last night as we were about to turn off the lights and go to bed, Tom said, “Let’s play one worship song.” I sat down ready to enjoy these few moments together focused on Jesus.

He hit his playlist not knowing which song would play. It was a perfect choice for ending a wonderful Sunday – Gratitude by Brandon Lake.

We have much to be grateful for in our lives. But it isn’t because life has been easy. No, it is because God has been faithful to us through every season—the good and the hard.

As we grow old together, worship has become a place where age doesn’t matter. In fact, I think the older we get the more precious the words of well-written songs mean to us. They aren’t just words set to music, but reminders of what God has done for us in our 46 years of marriage.

Below are the lyrics. If you know the song you will be singing it as you read. If you don’t know it, we have included the link.

Gratitude, by Brandon Lake

All my words fall short
I got nothing new
How could I express
All my gratitude?

I could sing these songs
As I often do
But every song must end
And You never do

So I throw up my hands
And praise You again and again
‘Cause all that I have is a hallelujah
Hallelujah
And I know it’s not much
But I’ve nothing else fit for a King
Except for a heart singing hallelujah
Hallelujah

I’ve got one response
I’ve got just one move
With my arm stretched wide
I will worship You

So I throw up my hands
And praise You again and again
‘Cause all that I have is a hallelujah
Hallelujah
And I know it’s not much
But I’ve nothing else fit for a King
Except for a heart singing hallelujah
Hallelujah

So come on, my soul
Oh, don’t you get shy on me
Lift up your song
‘Cause you’ve got a lion inside of those lungs
Get up and praise the Lord

Oh come on, my soul
Oh, don’t you get shy on me
Lift up your song
‘Cause you’ve got a lion inside of those lungs
Get up and praise the Lord

Come on, my soul
Oh, don’t you get shy on me
Lift up your song
‘Cause you’ve got a lion inside of those lungs
Get up and praise the Lord, hey

Praise the Lord
Praise the Lord

Praise the Lord

So I throw up my hands
Praise You again and again
‘Cause all that I have is a hallelujah
Hallelujah
And I know it’s not much
But I’ve nothing else fit for a King
Except for a heart singing hallelujah
Hallelujah

It is the start of a new week – the first full week of Lent. May our hearts express gratitude for how Jesus has impacted our marriage for God’s glory.

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Welcome to our new followers. We cannot express how grateful we are for you and your desire to grow a strong marriage. If you have a moment, we would love to hear from you—where you live and how long you have been married.

Have a blessed week,

Tom and Debi

Photo by Nienke Broeksema on Unsplash

Posted in Christian Marriage, Music, Worship | Tagged , , , | 4 Comments

Foodie Fridays – Classic French Toast

Posted on March 7, 2025 by Debi Walter

I am not the only one who loves to cook in our home. Tom has his specialties that are his alone to make—French Toast being one of them.

The day Tom proposed to me he took me out for breakfast. I’m not sure how he managed to eat, as nervous as he was, but he did. Whenever we celebrate our special anniversaries, the first meal of the day is always a part of the celebration.

The morning of our anniversary last week, Tom made me French Toast.

There is something comforting about warm bread with cinnamon and maple syrup. It warms the soul and starts the day with a smile.

We believe the key to making the best French toast is the bread; Brioche is our favorite. It stands up to the egg mixture without making the bread soggy.

This is the recipe he uses in case you’d like to give it a try.

I’d say our year is off to a good start!

Do you have a favorite tradition that includes food? We’d love to hear about it!

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Again, we must say how grateful we are that you have taken the time to visit our vineyard. Marriage isn’t easy, but it is worth the effort. The fact that you are choosing to read a blog about marriage shows your desire to make it work.

May God bless your efforts with another year together!

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

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Fresh Eyes

Posted on March 5, 2025 by Debi Walter

It is spring in Florida and it is invigorating. The birds are especially loud this time of year. They are busy preparing their nests.

With the focus on our home in Monday’s post, it has given me fresh eyes for an important part of the home.

Take a good look at your bedroom.

The bedroom is the one place that is ours. If you have children at home they can easily take over the space with toys, homework and other things that clutter up your space. They may even sleep in your room more than theirs.

If you don’t have children to blame, then let’s be honest and put off procrastination.

I am now seeing things which through the winter months have been neglected.

What clutter has accumulated that doesn’t belong? Laundry, bills, receipts or even dust? If you’re like me I put it off thinking I don’t have time. But in reality we do.

This is a nudge to encourage you to reclaim your space. It should be a place of retreat for you and your spouse alone.

Try this challenge: Set the timer for 30 minutes and get to work. See how much you can accomplish before the timer goes off. You may be surprised at your ability to finish the job.

May God help has have fresh eyes today to do what needs to be done in order to make our room a place of refuge for us now and in the days to come.

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Thanks for stopping by our vineyard. We are happy to have you and hope your marriage is encouraged as a result.

Blessings,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

Posted in Christian Marriage, Keeping It Real, romanticizing your master bedroom | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

There’s No Place Like It

Posted on March 3, 2025 by Debi Walter

Having just returned from celebrating our anniversary, we are freshly aware of how much we love coming home. It doesn’t matter how nice the place is we visited; there comes a point when we both just want to be home.

I remember when we were first married. I had never lived away from my parents and Tom had been on his own for over 5 years. I moved in to his one-bedroom condo and was excited to make it ours.

Only 5 months after our wedding, Tom was transferred to Miami. His employer paid for our move, so all we had to do was choose our next home—in Miami.

We found a small apartment in the up and coming neighborhood of Miami Lakes. The management company offered only a month-to-month lease. They explained it was because they catered to airline employees who needed the flexibility. We believed them.

Unfortunately, after only 5 weeks we received a notice that our apartments were converting to condos; we could either buy or move.

Since we didn’t have the means to buy, we were forced to find another home. This time we had to pay for the move ourselves!

Our third home in only 7 months.

We had learned our lesson and made sure we found a year lease agreement in Pembroke Pines. It was a condo that overlooked the golf course. We loved it.

This was our home for 8 months. While we loved our condo, we missed Orlando, or should I say, I missed it!

I was born there, and didn’t know how much I loved it until I no longer called it home. God surprised us by making a way for Tom to be transferred. I was elated!

My Mom started house searching for us. We didn’t think we could afford to buy, yet God had already made a way.

In May of 1980, after being married only a year and 3 months, we were able to buy a 3 bedroom, 2 bath home. It was perfect! This was the place where we would start a family and settle down for the next twelve years.

There was a a neighborhood where many families lived from our church. We wanted to buy a home there. It wasn’t just a house we were buying, it was a community. We listed our home and in 6 weeks we closed on our old home and bought our new home.

That was in October of 1992. We have lived here for thirty-three years, and we still love calling it home.

So many memories are held within these walls. Our home adapted as our family needs changed. Now we are “open nesters” as we like to call it. Free to have friends over to share a meal, or a place for our growing family to visit.

Home is the place where marriage is lived in the highs and lows. It’s the place where we both rest, work, entertain and host. It is our little plot of earth to cultivate and make beautiful.

There’s no place like it!

What has been your home journey? It’s good to remember and thank God for all the places He has provided.

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Welcome to our home on the internet. We moved to this address in November of 2008. We have lots of posts covering every topic concerning marriage. We invite you to stay awhile and make yourself at home.

Blessings,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

Posted in Christian Marriage, Growing Strong Marriages, Seasons of Life, Testimonies | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Foodie Fridays – Creamy Tomato Soup

Posted on February 28, 2025 by Debi Walter

Confession: My love for cooking started as a challenge. When our daughter was diagnosed with Celiac disease we had to rethink every favorite family recipe. This led me to find new recipes too, from those suffering with the same limitations.

Thankfully the internet has a wealth of great sites offering excellent recipes. Our favorite is Against All Grain, by Danielle Walker.

Years later I discovered I am extremely sensitive to most soy products. This was a huge set back for me. I love Asian food and sushi. The only way I can enjoy it is to make it myself. I thank God for Coconut Aminos, a great substitute for soy sauce. Here is a favorite recipe: Kung Pao Chicken that I sub in coconut aminos for the soy sauce.

This week Tom really wanted tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. Since we are away celebrating our anniversary, we decided to buy it already made. Only one problem—every can in the grocery store, even the organic ones, is made with soybean oil.

Challenge accepted!

I searched on some of my favorite food blogs and found a great recipe at Natasha’s Kitchen. The only changes I made to it was using half and half in place of heavy cream.

This is the perfect soup to go with a three cheese grilled cheese sandwich. Comfort food for a cold winter day.

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Thanks for following us and choosing to better your marriage. It is a joy to hear from you and how God is helping you grow a stronger relationship together.

And we would be remiss to not thank you for all the Happy Anniversary wishes. It blessed us to hear from so many of you.

Grateful to God for 46 years,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

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Vintage Post – Old Age, Fresh Love

Posted on February 26, 2025 by Debi Walter

Originally published in July 2017

“Come grow old with me. The best is yet to be” is a quote lovers use often to express their devotion. However, when old age is knocking on the door it doesn’t seem to have the same romantic appeal. It is a much more sobering statement that requires a deep examination of the heart. I think it would help us to hear the entire quote by Robert Browning…

“Grow old along with me! The best is yet to be, the last of life, for which the first was made. Our times are in his hand who saith, ‘A whole I planned, youth shows but half; Trust God: See all, nor be afraid!”

I have observed several dear friends who have had to watch their spouse die a slow death. It wasn’t easy, but it was love demonstrated in its purist form. My respect for their commitment to the covenant they made on their wedding day couldn’t be any higher. They made their marriage vows stand the test, and I believe they will hear the words, “Well Done!”

Every season brings with it an opportunity to learn to love and appreciate our spouse in a way we didn’t have to in the previous season.

  • When you have your first child and you see your spouse in this new role, it can be attractive or not. It depends on how well you are both geared to this change.
  • When your children grow up and leave the home it provides another opportunity to adjust and grow, or stagnate and drift apart. The choice is always there, but sometimes we don’t see it clearly.
  • When you retire and both of you are now together 24/7, this demands another adjustment in your relationship. It can either be for the good or bad depending on your willingness to adjust and grow.

There is a key that helps unlock the beauty of the new season–Communication!

We shouldn’t be surprised by the changes. They are inevitable. But we must be able to talk about them and how they are affecting us. Hiding the struggle only prolongs the uncomfortableness of it all. Talking about it, though hard to begin, brings the needed adjustment so you can move forward allowing you to enjoy the “last of life” more than the first.

May we all have marriages that last according to God’s plan. “Trust Him“, as Mr. Browning penned, so we can “see all, nor be afraid.” 

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It’s Our 46th Anniversary

Posted on February 24, 2025 by Debi Walter

Rather than talk about it, we thought we’d let pictures speak of the life we’ve made together.

When we met at Jesus ‘76
Our engagement day
❤️ Our wedding day ❤️
Our honeymoon
Three grown kids we love and respect
But my heart is his
Our Georgia kiddos
Our Tennessee kiddos
Our Florida kiddos with one to come…
…and here she is
Trip to Utah
Precious grandkids
Pawley’s Island, SC
St. John’s River
Our favorite sport
Or on the water
God has been faithful to lead us through many seasons—ones we loved and ones where we learned more about His love. Happy Anniversary babe.
Posted in anniversaries, Christian Marriage | Tagged | 4 Comments

Foodie Fridays – Lemon Blueberry Scones

Posted on February 21, 2025 by Debi Walter

I fell in love with scones when Starbucks first featured their pumpkin scones in the fall.

As I often do, I decided to try them at home and see if they were better. The difference between “made across the country, frozen and shipped to my city”, and “hot out of the oven freshness” can’t be compared. I was hooked and surprised that it wasn’t that difficult.

We had some blueberries that needed to be used, and Tom asked me to make lemon blueberry scones.

The key to flaky, tender scones is to put the butter in the freezer long enough to make it very cold, but not frozen. Then, grate the butter and combine it with the flour mixture by hand.

The more evenly distributed the butter is in the flour, the more flaky your scones will be.

I hope you’ll give these a try. They are worth the effort.

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Welcome to our new followers. This is not the blog of a cooking influencer, just a wife who enjoys cooking for her husband. So every Friday I share something I’ve either made or a dish we’ve enjoyed together at a restaurant.

On Mondays and Wednesdays we usually post about how to grow a healthy marriage. We’ve been doing this now since 2008, so there are plenty of archived posts to peruse.

We are grateful you have stopped by today. We welcome you and hope you’ll visit often.

Blessings,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

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Solid Rock

Posted on February 19, 2025 by Debi Walter

Yesterday we shared the importance of dealing with offenses as they happen. And happen they will!

Today I was reminded of another One who left His mark on our marriage—etched in stone, as it were. Jesus is our solid rock, our firm foundation.

What He has done on the Cross and the events that followed has forever made its claim on us. We are His and our marriage is built on this firm foundation.

Pause and think of your own marriage and from where you’ve come. If you look close enough you can see the thread of God’s faithfulness in your story.

I love the song titled, Counting My Blessings. “The more that I look at the details, the more of Your goodness I find.”

When Jesus died and rose again victorious, He set in stone eternal forgiveness of our sins. That is if we believe He is who He says He is and trust Him to save us.

Does this sound too good to be true? We who struggle to let go of petty offenses?

“The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost.”
‭‭1 Timothy‬ ‭1‬:‭15‬ ‭ESV‬‬

This is why it is called the good news of the gospel. Jesus paid it all, and if we place our marriage on this solid rock, how can we not forgive each other when we have each been forgiven so much?

Offenses that are set in stone may seem to require a jackhammer to remove, as we shared yesterday. But when placed on the solid rock of Christ’s all-forgiving grace offenses dissolve quickly.

You may realize there are things about which you need to talk to your spouse. We encourage you to do so quickly.

Deeper intimacy is waiting on the other side of forgiveness.

Photo Credit: Sven Mieke on Unsplash

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Dust or Stone

Posted on February 18, 2025 by Debi Walter

It is time for a heart check up. Not the kind where you go to the doctor, but the kind where you go to God.

Marriage is challenging on many levels and the opportunity for being hurt or offended is likely. What we do with the offenses matters.

Imagine a home where the dust has been allowed to settle on the furniture. At first it isn’t noticeable but after a few weeks it can’t be missed. The Holy Spirit may even offer conviction by writing in the dust, “It’s time to deal with this.”

Once you surrender and follow His lead, you realize it wasn’t as difficult as you thought it would be. You’ve wiped the surface clean and your marriage is better for it.

Then there are those who don’t ignore the offense; they play it over and over in their mind until it is practically etched in stone. They may even throw a few loose rocks back at their spouse out of anger in retaliation.

I know this is an extreme metaphor, but unforgiveness and resentment never produce good in marriage. Like writing your name in wet cement, there’s a bit of time where you can wipe it smooth. But leave it to set and the result may take a jackhammer to undo.

“Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.”
‭‭James‬ ‭1‬:‭19‬-‭20‬ ‭ESV‬‬

So how is your heart before God? Would He say you have dust to deal with or stone? Your answer matters.

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Welcome to our new followers. What a privilege to share our experience with you to help your marriage grow strong for a lifetime.

Blessings,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

Posted in Biblical Encouragement, Christian Marriage, Difficulty, Forgiveness, Keeping It Real | Tagged , , , , | Comments Off on Dust or Stone

Foodie Fridays – Shaved Beef Stir Fry

Posted on February 14, 2025 by Debi Walter

The Super Bowl food this year was a huge hit. I made Philly Cheesesteaks in anticipation of the Eagles win over the Chiefs. They succeeded too…40-22, in case you missed it. We were still sad that our food of the night wasn’t from Buffalo, my husband’s birth place. But there’s always next year.

We had some shaved rib eye leftover, and neither of us wanted another cheesesteak. So Tom did some research and found this stir fry recipe. I’ve never made beef stir fry, always with chicken, so I was excited to try it. And even more excited for Tom to cook.

As an aside, can I give a shout out for my cast iron skillet? Mine is perfectly seasoned and is better than any non-stick pan. Not to mention it is better for you too.

Yum! This is a new favorite. Since I can’t have soy sauce the only Asian food I can have is what I make myself. Unless, of course, Tom cooks it for me. 🥰

If you’d like to try this yourself, here’s the recipe: Shaved Beef Stir Fry

Happy Valentine’s Day to you and your spouse. Make it memorable and special in your own way.

Blessings,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

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Vintage Post—Valentine’s Hype or Help?

Posted on February 12, 2025 by Debi Walter

Today’s post was originally shared in 2013, but the message is just as important today.

I can’t count the number of couples I talk to who choose not to celebrate Valentine’s Day. They say it’s just another day where Hallmark, florists and chocolate companies are trying to get us to give them what’s in our wallets. Such a cynical view, even if it’s true.

So let’s unpack this idea. First we’ll talk about the hype and the excuses people give to NOT celebrate February 14th:

It’s a fact there are companies who hope to increase their profits on those who take part in celebrating Valentine’s Day. They spend lots of money on marketing to convince us of our need to do this. This is the American way, and we can choose to take part or not. 

On the other hand, good relationships don’t need to buy a card to help make their marriage better or stronger. No purchased item can do this, even if the commercials tell you differently.

Valentine’s Day has become commercialized, so has Christmas for that matter, but we don’t throw the holiday away as a result. We choose to celebrate it in the way that is most meaningful to us. Why not do the same with Valentine’s Day?

Having one day to focus on your love, or two if you celebrate your anniversary, isn’t a bad thing. It can be a very good thing–not only for you, but more importantly for those who are close to you watching your marriage.

I remember years ago when I was planning a romantic Valentine dinner for Tom here in our home. Our daughter had a friend over, and she commented how affected she was by seeing the excitement we had over sharing this night together with a romantic dinner for two. Had we not taken part she would have still known we loved each other because we’re still together. But how much better it is for her to see us making an effort to enjoy our own Valentine dinner.

She may have forgotten that night if we were just home doing what we always do. But because we did something special for the two of us–she’ll most likely remember it and hopefully it will even have an effect on her own marriage.

Our marriage isn’t just about us. It’s about the example we provide to a watching world of Christ’s love for the church.

Now whether or not we celebrate Valentine’s Day has no bearing on how genuine our love is. Please don’t hear me say that! But February 14th is a great opportunity to put the beauty of marriage–your marriage—on display to those who are closest to you. And it can be a lot of fun! ❤

Finally, we want to share a Hallmark commercial with you. If you were to ignore the fact that they’re wanting you to buy something, you’ll hear a powerful message about lasting love and commitment through all the seasons of life together.

Let’s let the light of our love shine brightly this Valentine’s Day. Even if the only ones who will see it call you, Mommy and Daddy.

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Welcome to those of you who found us by searching for Valentine’s Day ideas. There are plenty more ideas you can find by clicking on our categories tab, but it’s not easily found on your smart phone. You’ll have to use your laptop or desktop computer to access them.

Happy Valentine’s Day to you both,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

Posted in Christian Marriage, Holidays, Romance in Marriage, Valentine's Day | Tagged | Comments Off on Vintage Post—Valentine’s Hype or Help?

Valentine’s Day Tips

Posted on February 10, 2025 by Debi Walter

This is the one day set aside for you to make the most of your love. But where do you start?

Think of the things your spouse loves. How can you highlight these things in an unexpected way?

Examples:

If your spouse loves flowers, buy them or cut a fresh bouquet from your garden.

If your spouse loves food, cook or bake them something unexpected, or treat them to a fine dining experience.

If your spouse loves the outdoors, plan a time to enjoy it. i.e. fire pit, hike, picnic or outdoor movie night.

If your spouse loves or needs to relax, give them an awesome massage or set up an appointment for one. Followed by a hot, steam shower or soaking bath.

If your spouse loves being active, sign up for a 5k together.

The point is to do what will make your spouse say, “Wow!” Even if it’s out of your comfort zone. Your willingness to make a memory with them will go a long way in creating intimacy.

It would be easy to bypass this holiday as a hokey, commercially laden holiday. But why not use it to deepen your connection. Chocolates, flowers and dinner are so blasé.

Don’t follow the norm but create your own memory.

What do you want your spouse to remember about Valentine’s Day 2025. It’s up to you to make it happen.

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Welcome to our new followers. What a privilege it is to come alongside you in your marriage journey. May this Valentine’s Day be more than a Hallmark idea but one where you deepen your affection for the one who knows you best.

Blessings,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

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Foodie Fridays – Fried Eggplant

Posted on February 7, 2025 by Debi Walter

This is a dish my husband introduced to me when we were first married. I had never heard of eggplant much less learned to love it. If you find yourself in the same place, you are about to find a new favorite.

We love going to farmer’s markets to see what looks fresh and good. A few weeks ago, eggplant looked gorgeous with the deep purple shiny skin. We couldn’t resist!

Tom peeled and sliced it for me and I did the rest.

Cut the eggplant in about one inch slices. Dip it in a mixture of flour and cornstarch. Then dredge in eggs and then dip in Italian bread crumbs.

Heat a skillet with olive oil. When shimmering, fry the eggplant on each side for 2-3 minutes or until nicely browned.

Drain on paper towels and salt to taste. Or you can dip is Italian sauce.

This is a great appetizer to serve on Super Bowl Sunday too.

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Welcome to our new followers. We are so glad you are choosing to invest in your marriage, and we don’t take it lightly that you’re here. We’d love to hear from you!

Blessings,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

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Constant

Posted on February 5, 2025 by Debi Walter

This is a word that defines Tom’s leadership and love in our marriage.

We have been members of our church from day one—40 years ago this April. We have lived in the same home for 33 years this fall. Tom worked at the same job for over 30 years. And best of all we will celebrate 46 years married on the 24th of this month.

Constant.

At the base of all these pinnacles is Tom’s faith. My husband has led our family well. He has been constant in building our lives on the foundation of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Have we messed up? More times than we care to remember. But God has helped us repent when needed and change for His glory.

Constant.

Tom has been faithful to me as a husband. Even in moments of discouragement and failure, these times have given us a testimony that brings authenticity to our story. We get it! failure happens because we’re human, but God rescues us from us.

Constant.

His prayers have prepared the ground for generations to come. The Bible says our prayers are circling the throne of God as incense before Him. I have witnessed Tom’s heartfelt prayers for our grandchildren we know by name and those great-grand babies who are yet to be born.

Constant.

God is the faithful One who chose each of us before we were born. He has been constant in every paragraph above. His love has been constant and we are grateful!

How has God been constant in your marriage?

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Welcome to our new followers. What a privilege to help in your marriage success. We may plant and water, but it is God who provides the growth.

Blessings,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

Posted in Celebrations, Christian Marriage, Growing Strong Marriages, Priorities | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Humility

Posted on February 3, 2025 by Debi Walter

“Unity grows where humility flows.” David Bush

Tom and I had the privilege this Sunday to attend a grand opening celebration. It was for a church in Miami that our church planted 28 years ago.

They just acquired a permanent facility for their church to settle in Miami Gardens. No more renting. The entire day was filled with touchstones only God could produce.

David, now the senior pastor, was 3 when his parents joined our church in Orlando. Today he is 36 and married to the daughter of that church plant’s pastor.

Why do I share all of this? It is primarily to show that God always brings us full circle to see His faithfulness, if we are watching for it.

David’s message today was anointed by the Holy Spirit. He spoke of the importance of humility to produce unity in the church. He used the example of his yard.

When they bought their first home the front lawn was lush and green; the kind of grass you want to walk on barefoot. But now a couple of years later, the yard is covered with weeds and dirt. He said the reason is he failed to water the grass.

The application is that in order for the grass to grow it needed water. It is the same for the church or any relationship. We need the water of humility for unity to flourish.

Are you and your spouse struggling to communicate peacefully? Do words lead to misunderstandings which lead to conflict? Oh, we have been there. And it’s usually over the stupidest of things. The enemy sits back and smiles as he watches his plan at work to divide us. Pride doesn’t want to back down, especially if you feel misunderstood.

How do we stop this trend?

Humility. Jesus demonstrated humility for us by taking the lowest place. He who placed the stars and their expanse in the sky, chose to limit His power to rescue us from the bondage to sin. He went even further by dying on a cursed cross. He knew we could never conquer the power of sin, so He did what we couldn’t do. What a glorious gift salvation is for those of us who believe.

Humility isn’t thinking less of yourself. It’s thinking of yourself less, as John Piper has said.

Consider this past weekend—How was the temperature in your marriage? Heated? Do you know why? If not, examine the events leading up to the increased tension. Was there something you wanted that you didn’t get? Or was your spouse selfishly demanding their own way? We all give in to these temptations. We are still prone to sin, but not bound to it. We have a way of escape. It is simply to humble ourselves, and take the lowest place so Christ is exalted and unity is restored.

Unity is marriage is cultivated by a humble heart.

May God grant us the desire to seek humility above all things for the good of our marriage and for God’s glory.

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Foodie Fridays – Triple Cherry Pie

Posted on January 24, 2025 by Debi Walter

We have a tradition in our family. Rather than celebrate birthdays with cake, I bake birthday pie.

This week we had our daughter and grandchildren here and it happened to fall on our grandson’s 15th birthday. He was asked what pie he wanted. Cherry, was his pick.

I have a recipe I’ve developed using three kinds of cherries: Red Tart, Dark Red and Bada Bing with stems.

I’ve made it many times but often the pie is too runny. This time I tried cooking the juice, sugar and cornstarch in a pan until the sugar was melted and the juice started to thicken.

I then added it with the cherries into the prepared pie crust and topped it with softened butter. Last the lattice crust was put on top. I baked in a preheated, 400 degree oven for 45 minutes. Covering the pie with foil loosely the last 15 minutes will prevent browning.

I must say it was a huge hit. These photos say it all!

Happy Birthday, Bradley.

Triple Cherry Pie
by Debi Walter

Ingredients:

1 1/4 c. sugar
3 T. corn starch
1/4 t. salt
1/2 t. cinnamon
1 T. butter, softened
1 14 1/2 ounce can Oregon red tart cherries, drained
1 14 1/2 ounce can Oregon dark sweet cherries, drained
1 jar Bada Bing Cherries, 1 cup juice reserved
1/4 t. vanilla extract
2 t. lemon juice
1 double-crust pastry deep dish 9”

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Drain cherries, reserving 1 cup juice from the Bada Bing Cherries only.

Combine sugar, cornstarch, cinnamon, and salt. Whisk well.

Add cherry juice to the sugar mixture and cook over medium heat until clear and starting to thicken.

Pour heated juice over cherries. Stir well. Add butter and vanilla extract to cherry mixture. Stir and let stand for 15 minutes.

Pour cherry mixture into pie crust and finish top with lattice work pie crust.

Bake for 50 to 55 minutes. You can cover loosely with foil the last 10 minutes if the crust is getting too dark.

Warm to room temperature, then place in refrigerator for at least 2 hours to set. Enjoy.

Have a great weekend!

Thank you to all who have signed up to follow our blog. We are grateful you’re here. We pray your marriage is encouraged by our journey.

Blessings,

Tom and Debi

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Foodie Fridays – Baked Feta with Cherry Tomatoes

Posted on January 17, 2025 by Debi Walter

Sometimes you happen upon a recipe that is so easy and delicious. We had this at our daughter’s during the holidays and as I watched her throw it together, I didn’t think it would be incredible. I am surprised to say it was amazingly incredible!

She told me this recipe had gone viral on social media sites, and now I understand why.

I used the recipe found on Alexandra’s Kitchen website. Her video will make your mouth water.

I served ours with bow tie pasta. It was delicious hot, and also good cold for lunch the next day. If you try it, let me know what you think!

Have a blessed weekend!

Buon Appetito,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

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15 Tips for Communication in Marriage

Posted on January 15, 2025 by Debi Walter

We thought it would be good to offer some practical tips and quotes after our post on Monday. Let us know in the comments if you have more tips to add. We all need help to be good communicators in marriage.

  1. Being honest with your spouse doesn’t give you permission to say whatever you feel like saying under the guise, “I’m just being honest!” Once words are spoken you can never take them back. Think before you speak.
  2. The best way to understand your spouse is to ask them good questions and listen to what they say in response. Oftentimes we assume we know what they’ll say, so we don’t listen as we should.
  3. Listen with the filter of grace. If they are confessing sin to you, remember how much Christ has forgiven you. If they are sharing concerns about something you’ve done, remember no one knows you better than your spouse. Listen and pray for God’s help in hearing it with grace, not condemnation. Many times our spouse sees areas in our life we are blind to. If we ignore their observations we won’t grow.
  4. If a topic is off-limits, then get help. Just because you choose not to talk about it doesn’t mean it will go away. In fact, it will do more damage as it sits there and festers.
  5. Choose the right time to talk about important subjects. If your spouse is tired, it’s most likely they won’t have the energy to give the topic the attention it deserves.
  6. When you think the time is right to talk about something important to you, ask your spouse if they have a minute to talk about something weighing on your mind. This opens the door for a friend to come alongside and listen, rather than demanding your need without thinking of what might be weighing on their mind.
  7. Be considerate. Always.
  8. Omit absolutes like “you always…” or “you never…”
  9. Don’t accuse your spouse based on your observations. Tell them “It seems to me you might have….” Give them room to explain the situation with grace. We are not our spouse’s judge. We are their companion and best friend.
  10. Conversation builds the friendship between husband and wife in a way nothing else can. Don’t share things with your other friends that you haven’t spoken to your spouse about first. This is protecting your marriage friendship.
  11. Love your spouse even when they don’t deserve it. This is modeling Christ’s love for them and may break down the walls the enemy wants to build between you two. Love speaks softly, not judgmentally.
  12. “Assumptions are the termites of relationships.” – Henry Winkler (well said!) (You know what they say about what it means to “assume”–it makes an a** of u and me. Don’t do it.)
  13. “Don’t use words too big for the subject. Don’t say “infinitely” when you mean “very”; otherwise you’ll have no word left when you want to talk about something really infinite.” ― C.S. Lewis (Great advice from my favorite author.)
  14. “The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place.” ― George Bernard Shaw (If you’ve only thought about talking to your spouse be sure you actually do it.)
  15. You’re next…what communication tips can you share that helps you keep your conversation healthy and open?

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Welcome to our new followers. We don’t take it lightly that you clicked the “follow us” button. And we pray your marriage will be encouraged.

Blessings,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

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Only One Thing Is Necessary

Posted on January 13, 2025 by Debi Walter

“But the Lord replied to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered and anxious about so many things; but only one thing is necessary, for Mary has chosen the good part [that which is to her advantage], which will not be taken away from her.”” (Emphasis mine)
‭‭Luke‬ ‭10‬:‭41‬-‭42‬ ‭AMP‬‬

It is the start of a new year, the time for making resolutions and setting goals.

Hopefully your marriage is included in the evaluation. We must decide what is of most importance—listening to what is on God’s heart for us, like Mary did. She stopped everything and listened intently.

Tom and I have joined a marriage community group where we are going through Paul Tripp’s lessons on, What Did You Expect?. Although this book is out-of-print, Mr. Tripp has revised it with a more focused and updated title, Marriage. We highly recommend it!

Our CG leader asked us to share what our current need is and every couple shared a need to grow in the same area—communication.

It is interesting that communication was the top of the list for so many.

There can be as many reasons as there were couples in the room. But I believe it’s in large part the effect of smart phones on our listening skills. We scroll constantly from one post to the next, or one news feed to another.

It has been revealed through many studies that our attention spans are shrinking with the addition of screen use in our daily routines.

Maybe a modern day application to the Martha and Mary story would be that Mary chose to put her phone down in order to listen fully to Jesus, while Martha half-listened checking her friend’s IG feed.

Tom and I have talked about having a phone free day, but have never tried it. It seems impossible given it is our only means of being contacted by friends and family.

If we want to grow in our communication as husband and wife, it begins with listening well when our spouse is speaking. Based on the number of couples in our group struggling in this area, I imagine many of you can relate.

May we all pursue connection with each other through genuine communication from the heart. Our marriage depends on it, and it may be the one thing necessary for it to thrive.

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Welcome to our new followers. We don’t take your willingness to sign up for our emails lightly. We pray your marriage will grow and prosper this year as a result.

Please share what one area your marriage is in need of growth. Let’s encourage each other.

Blessings,

Tom and Debi ❤️❤️

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