Vintage Post – What Would Your Epitaph Say?

Posted on March 23, 2018 by Debi Walter

(This post was originally published on August 6, 2013.)

If we could plan to meet for coffee one afternoon, I’m sure we would talk about normal everyday kinds of things. But there would be a moment when the conversation turned to the more personal side, where I would share heart to heart what is currently going on in  my life.  There would be tears of sadness, followed by tears of gratefulness, but always the main point of the communication would be biblical fellowship. What is that, you might ask? It’s when two Christians (friends or spouses) sit down and talk about life in light of eternity. It’s talking about the things that matter most in the midst of the mundane, and attempting to make sense of it all using the infallible words of Scripture as the framework.

So, grab a cup and let me share with you what’s on my heart and mind lately.

I pray we’ll find biblical fellowship together and both be encouraged as a result. I’d love to hear your comments as well! The following was first posted at debigraywalter.com on my birthday.

♥

Last  month I turned 54. 54! How did that happen? I know, I know, the answer is simple–one year at a time. But wow.

This was my first birthday without my Mom and Dad (He died in 2004. She died in 2012)), who were used by God to give me life in July of 1959. My Dad led me down the aisle of our little baptist church in 1969. It is strange to no longer have parents here, but they’re not gone. They’ve just relocated to a better place. And because of God’s gift of salvation to me on December 19, 1969, I will see them again. Until that day I am resolved to live out the rest of my years in glorifying the One True God who gives life to all who call on His name and choose to follow Him.

Jonathan Edwards was considered to be one of the greatest American philosopher/theologians of his time and was a key figure in what has become known as The Great Awakening of the 18th century. He has been quoted as saying:

“Resolved, that I will live so, as I shall wish I had done when I come to die.”

The Trayvon Martin and George Zimmerman trial has received unbelievable media coverage this past month. We live only a few minutes from Sanford, FL. so it was with great interest that we stayed up with the trial. When that February night occurred in 2012, neither Trayvon nor George knew that their lives were going to be permanently changed as a result of the choices they made. My point isn’t to discuss which side was right/wrong, for both lost in my opinion. But their case stands as a stark reminder of Mr. Edwards quote.

I ask myself…

  • Am I living today as if it were my last?
  • What do I want to be known for?
  • If my epitaph was to be written tomorrow, what would it say?
  • Better yet, what would I want it to say?

I heard someone suggest that we take time to write the epitaph we would want written about us today. Then, make our choices based on that goal. Of course, even those who have the best intentions can’t always guarantee their life will play out as planned. This is why my epitaph should reflect God’s work in my life and not my own plans.

Photo Credit: Josh Martin Ink blog

Photo Credit: Josh Martin Ink blog

Some of my favorite epitaphs include:

George Washington

Looking into the portals of eternity teaches that the brotherhood of man is inspired by God’s Word; then all prejudice of race vanishes away.

Benjamin Franklin

The body of Benjamin Franklin, printer (like the cover of an old book, its contents worn out, and stript of its lettering and gilding) lies here, food for worms. Yet the work itself shall not be lost, for it will, as he believed, appear once more in a new and more beautiful edition, corrected and amended by its Author.

Evangelist Billy Sunday

“I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith, henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness.” – 2 Timothy 4:7

Wife and Mother, Frances Lowe – died November 28, 1877

A loving mother and devoted wife has gone to her rest, and the light has gone out in the happy home. Graces with those rare virtues which are peculiar only to her sex, the deceased was all the wife and mother could be. Her sorrowing husband to whom she had been a faithful and loving companion for so many happy years, now that she is gone will cherish her memory and children whom she has tenderly reared will arise up and call her blessed.

John T. Whitehead – died September 11, 1860

In All Life’s Relations He Exemplified The Virtues Of The Christian And Gentleman, And Won The Love Of All. He Was Beloved By His Family, Cheerful In Company, Conscientious In Spirit, Successful In Business, Patient In Affliction, And Victorious In Death. The Love Of This Community Claimed A Longer Stay, But Higher Attraction Prevailed, Earth Yielded, And Heaven Bore Away The Prize. The Key To His Most Triumphant Death Is Found In His Dying Request, To Be Put Upon His Tomb, “I Am A Man Of Prayer.”

(source for some epitaphs: Southern Graves blog)

After taking the last delicious sip of my latte, I would look in your eyes and ask, so what about you? What’s going on in your life and how can I pray for you? What would you want your epitaph to say?

 

Posted in Aging, Biblical Encouragement, Christian Marriage, Seasons of Life, Vintage Posts | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Wordless Wednesday #10

Posted on March 21, 2018 by Debi Walter

Photo by Brooke Winters on Unsplash

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Cherishing Your Spouse by Supporting Their Interests

Posted on March 19, 2018 by Debi Walter

One of the things I appreciate about my husband is the way he supports me in my interests. It’s no surprise that I enjoy writing. This is an area where Tom has no personal interest, but he makes room for me to pursue it myself.

For example, yesterday I hosted a Writer’s Cramp at our house. It’s where those in our writer’s group come with their current project and write for hours. We take a break for dinner and talk about how it’s going. A couple of hours later we finish by sharing a portion of what we’ve written getting feedback from each other. The one with the highest word count wins a prize. Last night’s prize was this…

It was a great night. We had 8 attend and together we captured on paper over 15k words. It doesn’t sound like much, but we were thrilled that our projects moved forward.

There was one member who wasn’t going to make it because he didn’t have a way to get here. Tom offered to come get him, which he gladly accepted.

He didn’t have to do that, but it was a small way that left a huge impact on me. He doesn’t simply endure my interests but he’s all in, ready to help in any way he can. That’s what cherishing your spouse looks like.

Most couples have common interests which they enjoy doing together. Handling differing interests with the same enthusiasm takes effort.

In what ways does your spouse support your interests? Better yet, in what ways do you support theirs?

I have a guest post up today on the Messy Marriage blog about Romancing Your Husband in the Way He Loves Most. It’s part of an excellent series I highly encourage you to read.

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Posted in Cherishing, Christian Marriage, Encouraging Your Spouse, Growing Strong Marriages | Tagged , | 1 Comment

2018 Date Night Challenge – “G” Date

Posted on March 16, 2018 by Debi Walter

This was such a fun date that Tom planned for us. He took me to Disney’s EPCOT Flower and GARDEN show and the displays were stunning. I love flowers. Seeing them all manicured and arranged like only Disney can do is always a treat for me.

When was the last time you spent an afternoon strolling through a garden together enjoying God’s creation? It’s a great way to enjoy Spring, and to slow down from your busy schedules. If only for an afternoon, it’s worth it!

We started by looking for a cache on our GEOCACHE app. There was a virtual one near the front of the park, and since we were in no hurry it was the perfect way to begin. Plus, I love finding caches–Tom not so much. But he did it for me, using his phone to find the coordinates.

I had fun looking for “G” flowers as we walked around the World Showcase Lagoon. Tom obliged my game by taking pictures for me on his phone. He captured the day well, don’t you think? (As a bonus we drove to the Animal Kingdom Lodge and saw the Giraffes).

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G for Giraffe 🙂

G stands for GREAT job, Tom. I had a blast!

Posted in 2018 Date Night Challenge, A Fragrant Aroma, Alphabet Dates, Christian Marriage, Date Night Ideas, Outdoor Dates | 2 Comments

Wordless Wednesday – Add Your Caption

Posted on March 14, 2018 by Debi Walter

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The Difference Deference Makes

Posted on March 13, 2018 by Debi Walter

Today’s marriage tip from our new book, Cherishing Us, reminds us of the benefit there is in deferring to our spouse.

March 13: Defer to your spouse as much as you are able. This is good for your marriage and good for your fight against selfishness.

Deference is defined as humble submission and respect. In what ways have you practiced deference in your marriage?

Maybe your spouse wanted to go out and you wanted to stay home. Deferring would be going out with a great attitude, not grumbling or complaining. Maybe the issue was much more intense, like deciding how to spend your bonus check. But not all deference has to do with decision making. It is an attitude of the heart that seeks to place our spouse’s interests above our own. It is the practice of unselfishness in all areas.

This is easier said than done. Especially when our desire is strong to do what we want. It goes against the wave of individualism sweeping across our culture. Our marriages should be different, and showing deference to one another is great place to begin.

4 Ways Deferring to your Spouse Builds a Healthy Marriage:

  1. It teaches us to say no to our own desires for the good of others.
  2. It is treating our spouse the way Christ has treated us. He deferred His rights in order to secure our salvation.
  3. It demonstrates our genuine commitment to bless our spouse at any cost.
  4. It denies our cravings for control.

Sheila Gregoire posted about Submission – Facts Every Wife Should Know, that applies well to our topic and addresses husbands as well at the end:

In most marriage ceremonies, Genesis 2:24 is read aloud: “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” God’s desire for us isn’t a tug-of-war relationship where one person gets his way; it’s for true oneness!

And I think that submission—“putting ourselves under” our husbands and willingly pursuing our husband’s best—is the primary tool to attain this oneness. In humility, we think of his needs, his wants, his interests, his desires, before we think of our own. We pursue his best before we pursue our best.

I think that’s a taller order than just “in the event of ties, he wins.” We don’t just defer to his decisions. We emotionally and physically invest in building him up and pursuing his best. And that sounds much more like the nature of the gospel to me. We serve. We love. We show grace. And our husbands serve us too, as they love us as Christ loved the church—even as they love their own bodies. That’s the recipe for unity, and it’s what Jesus really wants for us. (emphasis mine)

I love what Sheila says, deferring is the recipe for unity. My prayer for us today as that we will choose to defer for the good of our marriage. This is the heart of the one-flesh nature of a strong and maturing marriage. Each of us deferring to the other out of love, respect and joy.

Posted in Biblical Encouragement, Christian Marriage, Growing Strong Marriages, Roles In Marriage, Submission | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

5 Ways To Avoid Marriage Block

Posted on March 6, 2018 by Debi Walter

I’m a member of a writer’s group that celebrates it’s 15th anniversary today. We jokingly call our group “Writer’s Block” because I’m sad to say that more often than not this is what we are experiencing. 😩

Writer’s Block, in case you aren’t aware, is defined as the condition of being unable to think of what to write or how to proceed with writing.

Sometimes the reason is we know what we want to say, we just aren’t sure how to say it. Sometimes we are struggling to know what to write. Or maybe we are skirting the truth like in this scene from You’ve Got Mail…

Marriages go through a sort of block as well. We know we need to have a conversation, but we aren’t sure how to begin. Or we may start and then fumble from there, so we avoid it. The problem with avoiding those needed conversations is it doesn’t go dormant; It grows like an unattended weed. I’ve found that if one little issue is bothering me, it will become a bigger irritation the longer I try to ignore it.

If you’ve been married any length of time, this isn’t a new idea to you. Chances are high you have avoided many a conversation as well.

The question is what can we do to change?

  1. Humble yourself before God and ask Him to help you do what you can’t do in your own strength. He loves to show Himself strong through our weaknesses.
  2. Ask Him to help you see the situation from your spouse’s vantage point. This sounds easy to do, but usually we are convinced that we are right, so there is no need to consider any other perspective.
  3. Tell your spouse you want to talk about something, but you aren’t sure how. This will help your spouse realize your commitment to do something you need to do, even if it’s hard. And it will also help them find a way to draw it out of you. I have practiced this many times as a way to commit myself to talking when I’m am resisting it or afraid to begin. 😊
  4. Once you begin the conversation avoid saying always, and never, even if you believe it really is always or never. These are bridge breakers and wall builders. The object isn’t to prove your point, but to come to a place of mutual understanding and care.
  5. Work diligently to keep the lines of good communication open. That way when you have to have a more difficult conversation it won’t be as uncomfortable getting started.
  6. Consider using our new book, Cherishing Us, to that end. This is what Julie Sibert with Intimacy In Marriage has to say about it…

“Cherishing Ushelps you unpack hidden treasures in your relationship, as well as build new adventures through countless specific FUN date night ideas. It is full of questions that will inspire you and equip you to better understand the person you fell in love with and to help them better understand you.”

Difficult conversations are a regular part of any marriage. The difference between a healthy marriage vs. a struggling marriage when it comes to marriage block is knowing how to keep talking when you are upset or disagree. If you have tried countless times and failed, then please, please, seek outside help. The cost is too high to give up. Those who know you are counting on your marriage to succeed, especially your children.

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Happy Hour

Posted on March 2, 2018 by Debi Walter

It’s time to share some of our favorite reads from the past week. Enjoy…

Christian Communicators Worldwide

  • 35 Questions for Maturing a Christian Marriage – I happened upon this website with these excellent questions, and each one could lead to a meaningful and helpful conversation. We love asking good questions and these are excellent!

Hot, Holy and Humorous

  • What is Lusting?  – J does an in-depth study on this word and it may surprise you how this word is used in the Bible. Blog post title with illustration of woman facing forward and a thought bubble coming from her head

The Forgiven Wife

  • A guest post featuring Julie Sibert, with Intimacy in Marriage.
    After a divorce, she vowed that she would never again take sexual intimacy for granted.

The Generous Husband

  • Bedroom Expectations – If you are struggling with sex in your marriage, especially in the realm of how often or not enough, this post will help you open the conversation in a non-threatening way. Please don’t accept as normal having a less than satisfying sex life. It’s not God’s plan for you, so it shouldn’t be your plan either.

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Posted in Blog Love, Christian Marriage, Conflict, Happy Hour, Keeping It Real, Sexual Intimacy | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Local Date Night Gems – The Meatball Stoppe

Posted on February 26, 2018 by Debi Walter

Tom is Italian and his love language is spelled FOOD, so this date was going to be memorable. At least that was my hope.

The Meatball Stoppe

Located on Goldenrod Road, we had a long drive to get there, but it was well worth it!

The restaurant is in a small strip center. Non-impressive until you walk in the door. It felt like Home! From the owners welcoming us to come in and have a seat, to the smells of garlic and sauce simmering somewhere in the kitchen, to the huge wall of love displaying photos of family and friends obviously dear to our hosts. It is clear, this couple loves what they do so much they want their customers to feel like family. It worked!

Meet Jeff and Isabella Morgia.

When we asked Jeff about the restaurant, he asked if he could have a seat saying he doesn’t like to look down on his customers. We welcomed him at our table. 😊

He shared how they started the business, about his wife’s background in the restaurant industry, and his experience in corporate America. Together they have discovered something they can do together that they enjoy. And they do it well!

They offer 12 different varieties of meatballs with many gluten-free and vegan options. Their sauces are all GF.

We ordered the Meatball Flight of 5 meatballs, a side, focaccia bread, drink and cannoli to share at $19.95. You can choose 5 different meatballs if you wish, or any combination of your favorites. We picked three sausage, peppers and onions, and two traditional. They were fabulous! The texture was firm, but not dry. Seasoned well and hot out of the pot. We ate slowly to enjoy every bite!

It was a treat to discover that The Food Network Star–Guy Fieri, of Diners, Dives and Drive-in’s had featured The Meatball Stoppe a year ago.

Jeff said his business increased 300% as a result. We loved hearing what it was like to go through production of one of our favorite shows. Always much more work than you realize when you commit. I (Debi) found this out when I was on the Family Feud back in 2010.

We loved our time and invite you to make plans to visit The Meatball Stoppe. If you follow them on Facebook you can be informed when they are hosting special events, like the monthly tribute to Frank Sinatra.

This place is a true gem we highly recommend.

Posted in Christian Marriage | 2 Comments

Happy Hour + A Message From Us

Posted on February 23, 2018 by Debi Walter

This week is a big one in our lives. We published a new book that we are excited to finally offer to you. And we celebrate our 39th wedding anniversary tomorrow. How grateful we are to God and to our friends who have helped us with both. We realize we would not be where we are today in our relationship or in our ministry if it weren’t for the faithful input of friends who have cared for and prayed for us regularly. Most of all it is God who deserves the glory.

First we want to share with you our heart about the topic of cherishing in our marriage.

Following are our blogging friends who have shared about our book this past week or who have impacted us making this book possible. We hope you’ll visit their blogs and glean from the stories and wisdom they share. We are rich when it comes to relationships as you’ll see.

Gary Thomas

  • Why Are Christians So Mean? – Tom and I have felt this for years, and Gary writes about it beautifully. We pray God uses this post to influence a new culture of love and grace in the church. And Gary’s book Cherish has had a huge impact on our marriage. We can’t recommend all of his books enough. Buy them. Read them. Be changed by the truths he shares.

Heaven Made Marriage

  • Cherish Your Marriage Everyday – Scott is a friend with whom we have enjoyed extended time at our cabin for a Christian Marriage Bloggers Retreat. He is a lot like Tom in many ways, and his encouragement comes natural. He and Jenni both excel at reminding people of who they are in Christ, and it is for Him that we do our marriages well.

Hot, Holy and Humorous

  • Pursuing 4-Dimensional Intimacy – J invited me to contribute a guest post, since she is slammed with a busy season. I was honored for the opportunity, and I must say I love the metaphor I believe God inspired in this post. You’ll have to read it and see…

Intimacy In Marriage

  • 3 Reasons to Invest in Your Marriage – Julie’s thoughts about Cherishing Us. Julie is a busy mom, wife and blogger, yet she always has time to encourage others, myself included. This is another example of the many ways she has sought to build us up. We have yet to meet face-to-face, and I can’t wait for that day!

Life on the Lighter Side

  • Cherish is the Word – Bonnie is a dear friend who also goes to our church. We are in a writer’s group together and her encouragement has meant so much through the years. And this post is no exception. She does it well, sprinkled with lots of humor. 🙂

The Forgiven Wife

  • 7 Things I Love About Cherishing Us – Chris is a new friend that I highly respect. She is well-educated and thinks much more deeply than I do. These are the kinds of friends with whom I love to spend time; every conversation I learn something new. And her story is one that is honest, self-disclosing and full of lessons she has learned on this journey called marriage.

We would also love to give a huge thanks to the Christian Marriage Bloggers Association. We are 141 blogs strong and grateful for the support and networking they provide.

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2018 Date Night Challenge – “F” Date

Posted on February 23, 2018 by Debi Walter

Meme credit: No Small Life website

I had so many grand ideas for this date, but FAIL was not one of them. Once again, I’m sharing our FAILS with you, so you can realize that date nights have to be FLEXIBLE. But I must admit this one disappointed me.

Tom has decided to take up fishing again. Something he has enjoyed, but not had the time or resources to do on a regular basis.

My F date plan was to go to the beach on Valentine’s Day where he could FISH all afternoon. We would then have dinner at J.B.’s FISH Camp. From there I had reserved a FIRE RING on New Smyrna Beach where FRIENDS were going to join us for an evening under the stars.

Sounds perfect doesn’t it? Only one F I didn’t anticipate–FOG. The fog rolled in like a thick blanket and with it a cold, drizzly mist. Our friends had already driven over to join us for dinner. So we ate, went to the beach for this FOTO and left.

Rather than be disappointed with it all, I decided to take a FREE redo, which happened last night. We went to one of our FAVORITE local restaurants, FUZZY’s Taco Shop, and then came home to our own backyard FIRE pit. We talked about some of our FAVORITE dates through the years, and surprise–this F date might just be a new FAVORITE.

firepit

We’d love to hear about your alphabet dates. It’s not too late to join in the challenge. 

Check back next month when we plan Dates around the letters G and H. 

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Is Your Marriage All In?

Posted on February 21, 2018 by Debi Walter

Photo by Cory Bouthillette on Unsplash

There is growing tendency in newly married couples to stay independent financially, socially and emotionally. This is cause for great concern. Let me explain…

When we said, I Do, we were committing to a new way of life. We were declaring we were no longer “me”, but “we” and the way we do this is by merging our individualism into our union as one flesh.

In our finances

It is an important demonstration of trust to have a joint checking account. I have heard some say, “But then I can’t buy any surprise gifts for my spouse.” Tom and I have learned to either save cash as we can for those special gifts. Or we tell the other to not look at the checkbook until such and such a date. It is possible to work around it, and what it costs to not share your finances in regards to secrecy and lack of trust, makes it not worth it in our opinion. And here is the opinion of a qualified expert in regard to finances, Dave Ramsey.

I remember one year when we were on a very tight budget, living paycheck to paycheck, there was no extra money, at least that’s what Tom thought. Every week when I bought groceries I would save an extra $5 or $10 and put it away in a jar in our son’s closet. I also had garage sales where I was able to hide some of the money and add it to my stash. I did this for an entire year. By December I had saved $450 in cash and was able to surprise Tom with a new stereo system for Christmas.

The look on his face when he opened it revealed his fear that I had charged it. When I explained it was completely paid for, he was shocked! Then he wanted to know how I had found that kind of money. It was so much fun to tell him all I had done to make this happen. This spoke volumes to him of my desire to bless him in a way having separate checkbooks never could.

Don’t avoid the hard times for often those become our best memories.

In social events

When you are asked to go and do something with family or friends excluding your spouse, that should be a red flag to you! First of all, if you want to go and do without your spouse, why? When you said you were committing your life to your spouse until death parted you, that meant saying no to your old normal. You are no longer two, but one. It’s important to act like it.

Second of all, you are declaring to your old way of life that your new way of life is a priority to you. You have an enemy who wants nothing more than your marriage to fail, making a mockery of your vows. Be on guard and fight this drift to individualism.

Thirdly, your may be throwing little darts at your spouse’s heart. They may not tell you that, but if they are honest it most likely hurts that you are choosing to be selfish in planning your social time.

Of course, I am not saying you can never do anything without your spouse at your side. What I’m talking about is choosing time with others over spending quality time with your spouse on a regular basis. Marriage takes time to cultivate, especially when you are first married. The best thing that happened to Tom and me when we were newlyweds was we moved to another city far away from our old normal. We had no choice but to cling to each other, even when we had a fight. We had no one else to talk except each other. I didn’t like it at the time, but we were laying a solid foundation of WE that has supported us through all kinds of difficulty.

And living this way has huge benefits that you may not realize until it’s too late. Consider C.S. Lewis’ experience…

C.S. Lewis’s wife, Joy Davidman, died of bone cancer on July 13, 1960. The next day, the famous author wrote a letter to Peter Bide, the priest who had married them, to tell him the news.

“I’d like to meet,” Lewis writes, suggesting the two grab lunch sometime soon. “For I am—oh God that I were not—very free now. One doesn’t realize in early life that the price of freedom is loneliness. To be happy is to be tied.”

Don’t avoid each other when in conflict, lean in and grow stronger together.

In our emotions

As a single I never had anyone with whom I could confide my deepest feelings. I had friends but none who really knew me, which was mostly my fault. When Tom entered my life, he was the first who really pursued me emotionally. He would ask questions and actually listened as I answered. It was unnerving, yet comforting at the same time. I was learning to trust him with my emotions and every time I thought he was going to think I was silly, he loved me all the more. I got to see up close how Christ loves me and I have never been the same.

I can’t imagine how hard it would have been to switch my emotional dependence from life-long friends to Tom. But I am here to say you can do it. Not that you have to shun your old friends, but you must let them know that your spouse is first in your heart and emotions. To share things with them before your share with your spouse is wrong. Don’t do it! It may feel uncomfortable, it may take extreme self-control, but this in a part of honoring them as the most important relationship in your life.

Helpful posts from Gary Thomas on How Men and Women think differently:

All three of these temptations to independence are the primary ways God helps us grow more intimately together as husband and wife. No wonder the enemy of our souls chooses to go after them.

In which of these three ways are you being tempted to drift in your marriage? We encourage you to seek help. Years from now you’ll be glad you did, and you’ll have a strong foundation on which to stand to help others.

Are you all in?

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Posted in Christian Marriage, Difficulty, Growing Strong Marriages, Newlyweds, Priorities, Seasons of Life, Showing Honor, Temptation | Tagged , , , , | Comments Off on Is Your Marriage All In?

Our New Book – Cherishing Us

Posted on February 19, 2018 by Debi Walter

Our book is now available!

This has been in our hearts for years. We have shared snippets with you on social media, but now you can have Healthy Marriage Tips within reach.

Cherishing Us is a compilation of 365 marriage tips, one for every day of the year. The book begins in Spring – March 1st – when everything in the Vineyard is coming to life. It speaks of promise and hope, something we pray you cling to for your marriage.

At the end of each month we have provided cultivation questions to discuss and help you to dig deeper and grow in your understanding of your marriage and each other. We also provide a date night prompt so you can mix some romance and fun into your month. 🙂

We all go through seasons of drought, cold and winter. Spring always follows and with it comes new life. No matter the difficulty there is hope. This is what we pray our book will remind you of each day.

Marriage is an adventure we take seriously. We pray this book will become a resource you use to cultivate your marriage vineyard.

God has been faithful to lead us to write this book, and it is because of Him and His work in our marriage that we have anything to offer.

Order your copy today! They make a great gift for engagements and weddings too!

Posted in Christian Marriage | 3 Comments

Cherishing Us – A New Resource to Help Your Marriage Grow

Posted on February 16, 2018 by Debi Walter

Photo: Nico Tavernise

I close my eyes and I can see
The world that’s waiting up for me
That I call my own
Through the dark, through the door
Through where no one’s been before
But it feels like home

I can’t hear Hugh Jackman sing this song without gratefulness welling up in my heart for what God has done in our marriage. What began as a dream in my husband’s heart when we were first engaged, has resulted in seeing God restore and grow not only our marriage, but countless others.

However big, however small
Let me be part of it all
Share your dreams with me

Today a dream of ours has come true thanks to so many for helping us along the way. 

Ten years ago Tom and I were immersed in marriage counseling through our church. It was difficult to see couples struggling in so many ways. Intimacy was broken, and we were there to listen, offer biblical counsel, but most of all friendship and faith. We encouraged them it didn’t have to stay this way.

I think of what the world could be
A vision of the one I see
A million dreams is all it’s gonna take
A million dreams for the world we’re gonna make

It was during this season that The Romantic Vineyard was born. We set up our blog as a tool to help these couples access resources to use when we weren’t available. It served that purpose well, but it has also become so much more.

We look back on this journey and all we can do is give God thanks for His indescribable gift; our marriage is more than we ever dreamed or hoped. Our blogging community has grown in ways beyond our expectation. This reveals the need all marriages have–to grow in intimacy: emotionally, spiritually, physically and intellectually.

In order to prevent the natural tendency there is to drift apart, we need the following to move forward:

  • We need help
  • We need hope
  • We need daily encouragement
  • We need to be intentional
  • We need God’s grace
  • We need to love and cherish our spouse in order to fulfill the vows we made at first.

Today we announce a new resource to help marriages grow stronger as the years pass…

Cherishing Us walks us through the seasons of a vineyard and relates it to cultivating a strong marriage. We pray this book will find a place in your home and heart. Read the daily tip and spend time talking about what God is showing you. Answer the questions at the end of each month and then celebrate by choosing one of the Date Night Prompts provided.

May God richly bless your marriage as you seek to grow it for God’s glory.

“A million dreams for the world we’re gonna make.”

Posted in Biblical Encouragement, Celebrations, Christian Marriage, Growing Strong Marriages, Music, resources | Tagged , , , | 7 Comments

2018 Date Night Challenge – “E” Date

Posted on February 12, 2018 by Debi Walter

Maison et Jardin Garden

It was Tom’s turn to plan our “E” date, and I must say he did an Exceptional job!

First, we had tickets for an Event at Maison et Jardin to view the newly renovated estate and sample their food. We met Executive Chef, Giovanni Bordenga, who prepared an appetizer of pork belly and gnocchi with pine nuts. It was amazing!

This former restaurant, now a much sought after venue for weddings, private parties and corporate events, is where Tom took me on our first date almost 40 years ago. Whenever we have a chance to visit, we are Ecstatic; A perfect way to start the Evening.

Next, Tom picked up a pizza to-go, and drove us to downtown Winter Park where Enzian Theater was hosting, Popcorn Flicks in the Park.

The featured film was, While You Were Sleeping. Although the movie didn’t fit with the “E” theme, Tom knows it is on my “Movies I Enjoy the Most” list.

All in all in was an Excellent date right up until the very END.

(You’re welcome!)

 

Posted in 2018 Date Night Challenge, Date Night Ideas, Free Dates, Movie Dates, Outdoor Dates | Tagged , , , | Comments Off on 2018 Date Night Challenge – “E” Date

Happy Hour

Posted on February 9, 2018 by Debi Walter

It’s been awhile since we featured some of our favorite blog posts. May I say it’s not because there is a lack of great content? It’s more because my schedule was pre-occupied with planning and pulling off an amazing wedding for our youngest daughter. She is a Mrs. now, and my heart is full. Now we can give our full attention to promoting marriages in as many ways as we can!

Following are some of our favorite blog posts we’ve discovered this week…

Active Manhood

  • How To Re-Kindle A Relationship–I was asked by Daren Dilts to answer this question, and this post is my take on it. Thank you, Daren, for the opportunity to participate.

Gary Thomas–Closer To Christ, Closer To Others

#StayMarried

To Love, Honor and Vacuum

Have a great weekend!

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Posted in Blog Love, Christian Marriage, Happy Hour | Comments Off on Happy Hour

2018 Date Night Challenge – “D” Date

Posted on February 6, 2018 by Tom Walter

Tom here.

It was my turn to plan our next date, the letter “D” Date, and I had come up with a great idea. What I didn’t plan for was the place to be closed for a private event. NO! And I didn’t know until the morning of our date. Double NO! I tell you about it because this happens sometimes, and you have to go to Plan B.

Plan A was to go on a Double Date with friends to Top Golf, a multi-level Driving range to hit golf balls. When I called to make our reservation I found out they were closed. Bummer. I told Debi about it, and gave her a raincheck for us to go another time. She was ok with that.

Plan B was a Double Date with same friends for Dinner at The Tap Room at Dubsdread.

After that we went to a game room for some Down time. We relaxed, laughed and had a great time.

M Bar offers FREE video games which made the night very affordable

This golf game was our favorite

Ford Mustang pool table

It was a Dynamite Double Date Night

The takeaway for all dates is to be flexible. When something doesn’t go as planned, don’t let it ruin the night. The whole point is to do something together to make a memory, and that we did!

Happy Dating!

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Posted in 2018 Date Night Challenge, Alphabet Dates, Christian Marriage, Date Night Ideas, Keeping It Real | Tagged , , , , | Comments Off on 2018 Date Night Challenge – “D” Date

Valentine’s Giveaways

Posted on February 2, 2018 by Debi Walter

Orlando Date Night Guide is giving away a free date night each day during the month of February. That’s 28 winners, plus a few more. Some days they are giving away more than one prize.

Click over and sign up. Don’t forget to sign up for your spouse too, and double your chances of winning.

Have a great weekend!

Posted in Blog Love, Contests, Date Night Ideas | Tagged , | 3 Comments

The Joy Of Writer’s Block

Posted on February 1, 2018 by Debi Walter

 

Writer’s Block is a frustrating place to be. And I don’t like it one bit! You do, like the meme suggests, feel like a failure. But there is another Writer’s Block that I actually look forward to having in my home on a monthly basis.

Writer’s Block is the tongue-in-cheek name of our writer’s group that has been meeting for years.

When we started almost 20 years ago, there was only a handful of us for whom writing was a hobby. We have grown in number. We have had our works published. It has been rewarding to look back to see how far we’ve come and how our friendships have deepened.

This week my dear friend, Bonnie Manning Anderson, has published her first book. It is her long-awaited fiction novel titled, Always Look For The Magic. This book is based on the stories her dad told her of his growing up years during The Great Depression. And can I say, it is not your typical first-time author’s novel? She has a voice and sense of humor that keep you wanting more. You will feel as if you are walking the streets of this small town with Artie and his brother, Tommy.

Artie knows that an unusual gift from his teacher can only mean one thing; his dream of becoming a magician is certain to come true. Why else would she give a top hat to an 11-year-old boy? With his brother Tommy, neighbor Pauline, and Maggie the dressmaker dummy by his side, things are finally looking up, until life around him gets weird. His parents refuse to admit that anything is wrong, but a mysterious knock on the door reveals that Artie’s greatest fear has come true.

Always Look For The Magic, is available on Amazon in paperback as well as e-reader versions. Do me a favor and support her accomplishment won’t you? I encourage you to buy it for yourself or as a gift. I assure you it will bring smiles and laughter to all who read it.

The real magic found in this book is the way Bonnie tells the story.

You can read more of Bonnie’s writing on her humor blog, Life On The Lighter Side. (If you do so before noon today and comment on her post, you will be entered to win a free copy of her book.)

 

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Posted in Blog Love, humor | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Local Date Night Gems – The Glass Knife

Posted on January 31, 2018 by Debi Walter

The owner collects glass-handled knives, which inspired the name

Tom and I recently visited The Glass Knife, located on 276 S ORLANDO AVE
WINTER PARK, FL 32789. It’s one of those places you didn’t know you missed until you found it. Orlando has needed a high-end dessert establishment that sells quality coffee as well as wine for a long time.

At the risk of sounding cliche’, let these photos speak for themselves. A picture really is worth a thousand words.

Red Velvet Cake with their signature edible, gold accents

Lovely Latte

I “donut” have to explain this one!

You can buy cakes whole or by the slice.

The Displays are their best advertisement

Individual booths make the experience quite romantic

The Glass Knife also offers a romantic Date Night Booth. At the time of this post it is on a first-come, first-served basis. However, they are making plans to offer reservations soon.

I failed to mention, they also serve savory foods for breakfast, lunch a dinner, but it was hard to notice with all these sweet offerings. You can check out their menus here.

Happy Dating!

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Posted in Birthdays, Celebration Dates, Date Night Ideas, Local Date Night Gems | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments