3500 Years Up In Smoke

Posted on January 17, 2012 by Debi Walter

Photo Credit: Arvind Balaraman

This morning I awoke before dawn with a plan, and so did someone else apparently. I read my Bible reading for today from the book of James…

So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things.
How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water.

(James 3:5-12 ESV)

…while another person chose to start a fire in the woods. I asked God to help me tame my tongue in order to prevent my hurtful words from catching fire, thus hurting those I love,  while a stranger sat back and watched the flames lick the trunk of this old tree with a smile.

Photo Credit: Mail Online

Central Florida has been home to the oldest Bald Cypress Tree in the world. It was believed to be 3500 years old and at one time stood 165′ tall, that is until a hurricane in the 1920’s broke it at the top. President Calvin Coolidge dedicated the park where “The Senator” stood in 1929, and many have visited the old Senator ever since. It was a landmark used by Indians in the past and presently a prized attraction for the small city of Longwood, FL.

On Monday morning, January 16th, around 6a. a runner noticed flames shooting from the top of the tree and called the Fire Department.

By the time they arrived the entire center of the tree was ablaze, and it was impossible to stop the damage. Within 30 minutes the tree fell, and all who were nearby heard it fall. Sadness stood in its place.

As I finished my quiet time with the Lord, this arsonist had finished his devastating work. There had been no lightning strikes in the area, no rain even, so the cause of the fire was a mystery. Until a pile of wood was found at the base of the tree indicating that this fire was started inside the tree where no one would see it until it was too late to stop it.  This was believed to be the work of an arsonist.

Who would choose to do such a thing? And why? Experts who study the behavior of arsonists say they do it for the thrill and excitement of seeing the damage wrought by their own hands. It sounds so sick, doesn’t it?

Yet isn’t it interesting that James chose this exact metaphor to describe our tongue and the words we choose? Having counseled married couples for years we have witnessed the damage caused by hurtful words. We ourselves have used words at times that were obviously spoken to stab and hurt, but never to destroy. Not really!

As Tom and I were talking about this at length he said most people when they use jabbing words are merely wanting to fire a warning shot across the bow, so to speak. It’s a warning to back off or more damage will ensue.

But sometimes, many times, our first shot makes a strike, and a fire is stoked. It can take a long time to put out the fire, much less repair the charred damage left behind.

How conscious are you of the words you choose to speak and why? Have you noticed your spouse back off when you vent? The Bible instructs us about the damage our tongues can cause, but gives us hope in so doing. We don’t have to use such words. We can say NO to this temptation.  The grace of God teaches us to say NO to ungodliness, but we must choose to say NO!

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
(James 1:19-20 ESV)

If we are saying we want a good marriage, but do nothing to bridle our tongues we are deceiving ourselves. Let’s be honest and choose to stop speaking in ways which send off warning shots. If anger is a besetting sin in your life, in your marriage, then we appeal to you to seek biblical counsel from someone you know and trust. When the flames of such words reach their peak, many more will be harmed and maybe all the years you’ve invested in your marriage and in your family will go up in smoke.

May it not be said of us!

Editor’s Note: Fire Fighters have  not confirmed arson at this time, so the cause is still a mystery. We believe the metaphor is still worth posting in regards to marriage, and we thank God, there may not be such an arsonist on the loose.

Posted in Christian Marriage, Conflict, Difficulty, Growing Strong Marriages, Temptation, The Gospel & Marriage | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

How Are You?

Posted on January 16, 2012 by Debi Walter

Graphic by: myspacegraphics24.com

I am often stumped by this simple question – how are you? I have to stop and actually think about how I am doing before I answer. I used to answer a quick, “fine and you?” But I can no longer do this with integrity. When someone takes the time to ask me this question I want to give them an honest answer. It’s just lately finding an honest answer that glorifies God and doesn’t draw unnecessary attention to me and my trouble takes thoughtful consideration.

This is a work God has done in my life. When a cashier at the grocery store asks me this question as I’m checking out, I know she really doesn’t want to know how I’m doing. This is her way of saying, “Hi!”

I get that.

But when a friend, or my husband asks me this question, I must give them an honest answer because I know they really want to know. And the only way for them to know is for me to tell them. They can’t read my mind, although I act at times as if they can.

I have been known to take offense when my husband doesn’t ask me how I’m doing. That sounds absurd, I know, but I think many married couples do this on a regular basis. If it weren’t common God wouldn’t have included this verse in the Bible from James 1:

Certainly God knows we lack wisdom. He wants us to ask as a means of our humbling ourselves before Him. He knows we have a tendency to NOT ask. But it is good to ask. In relation to marriage we can take this idea of asking and humbling ourselves as a way to serve our spouse. We can’t expect them to automatically know what we need. Most likely your spouse doesn’t think like you do; I know mine doesn’t, and I have learned to thank God for our differences. It gives us a balance we wouldn’t have left to ourselves.

So, why not plan a date night this week to talk about how you’re doing. And find out how  your spouse is doing as well. Most importantly – be honest – you know it IS the best policy!

♥ Fun Dates To Celebrate ♥

January 16

  • Martin Luther King Jr. Day

January 17

  • Benjamin Franklin’s Birthday – Send your spouse a key attached to a string with this note, “In honor of Mr. Franklin’s birthday – let’s fly a kite together!” Plan a picnic and enjoy an afternoon date outside. Weather isn’t cooperating? Give them an IOU to use in the spring.

January 18th

  • Jazz Day – Have your favorite artist playing when your spouse comes home for the night.

January 19th

  • National Popcorn Day – Pop up your favorite variety at home, or plan a date at the movies to celebrate.
  • Archery Day – Take your spouse to a shooting range to learn this ancient use of weaponry. Not a range around where you live? Watch one of the epic movies where archery is on full display.

January 20th

  • Cheese Day – Invite a few couples over for a Wine and Cheese party. Or enjoy three varieties yourself.
  • Basketball Day – This is a good excuse to spend an evening watching The Orlando Magic as they play the Lakers at 8p. ET, on ESPN.

January 21

  • Hugging Day – Remember when you were dating and how much you enjoyed hugging? Well, today is a great day to relive it! We’re not talking a hug as you leave for work – no, make it a long, meaningful hug. The kind that leaves you wanting more…

January 22

  • National Blonde Brownie Day – Yes, you are allowed to indulge today! Enjoy!!

♥ Things To Do In Orlando ♥

  • January 16, 2012: Celebrate Martin Luther King Day (from AboutOrlando.com)
    >Winter Park – Jan. 16, 2012 – Martin Luther King Jr., Day Symbolic Program.
    >Sanford – Jan. 16, 2012 – Martin Luther King Parade begins at 10 am on 13th Street to Holly Ave, to 9th Street then to Coastline Park.
    >Sanford – Jan. 16, 2012 – Martin Luther King Rally-in-the-Park. Community function with live entertainment, food and games starting at Fort Mellon Park in Sanford starts at noon. Shady Park at Hannibal Square after the parade.
    >Bok Tower Gardens – Jan. 16, 2012 – Martin Luther King Jr. Birthday Concerts. Music of hope, inspiration and peace to honor Dr. King.  Included with paid admission.
    >“The Help” Movie and Dialogue – Jan. 17, 2012 – Free admission at the Bush Auditorium, Rollins College beginning at 6:00pm. Facilitated discussion after the movie.

CENTRAL

  • Winter Park – Camellia Show and Festival on Saturday, January 21st at beautiful Mead Gardens from 10a – 4p. FREE.
  • Eatonville – The 23rd annual Zora Festival begins on Saturday, January 21st and runs through the 29th. See site for times, locations and details.
  • Winter Park – Music at the Casa continues on Sunday, January 22nd from 12p – 3p. FREE. This week’s featured artist is harpist, Christine MacPhail.

NORTH

  • Mt. Dora – Renninger’s Antique Extravaganza – Friday thru Sunday, January 20th – 22nd. This happens only three times a year – a great date day! See site for times and prices.

WEST

  • Clermont – Lakeridge Winery presents the Winter Music Series on Saturday, January 21st from 1p – 4p. FREE.
  • Downtown Winter Garden – Fridays on the Plaza features live music playing in the city’s gazebo from 7p – 9p. Check out JR’s Attic Door for a great place for dessert and coffee after dinner.
Posted in Christian Marriage, communication, Date Night Ideas, Growing Strong Marriages, Mark Your Calendars (time sensitive), Orlando Date Ideas | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Our Sunday Open House

Posted on January 15, 2012 by Tom and Debi

This weekend we were privileged to host a Bridal Shower (Saturday) and a Graduation Party (Sunday) in our home. We love doing this and have learned how to get our home ready to welcome visitors together as a team. We love entertaining, especially when it involves blessing someone else.

So, we thought it appropriate to open our blog to new visitors today as well – an Open House of sorts. We invite you to extend an invitation to your married friends to visit our vineyard today so they can enjoy a tour of all the things we have to offer.

Keefer's Animated Candles

Before we begin no open house is complete without music to set the mood and a little candlelight to warm the space. Click the video below and then, start scrolling to see links to other parts of The Romantic Vineyard with which you may not be familiar.

First of all, we want to share with you the app we have created for all who have iPads, iPods, iPhones or iTouch. (See the top of the sidebar for the link.) It is free and provides a Healthy Marriage Tip as well as great date night questions to help you communicate on a deeper level when you have the time alone. There is also a link to the blog included at the top of the app in case you were unable to read the post on your computer.  (Sorry we don’t know anyone who can write Droid apps at this time.)

The photograph at the top of our blog is from a trip we were able to take to Southern France in 2007. It was taken in the countryside of Provence on one of our morning walks. Little did we know when we took this picture that God had this blog in store for us in the future. What a gift this trip was and what a blessing The Romantic Vineyard has become as well. We love following the Lord and the paths He has marked out for us.

Underneath the picture you’ll notice tabs to different rooms in our Vineyard:

First, is our Best Cellars Store – this is where we list our favorite resources for marriage. Books, DVD’s and CD’s are all listed for your convenience.

Next is our newest room called “Courageous.” If you have seen the movie by the same name, this room offers more information to help you formulate your own resolutions in regards to establishing a family for God’s glory. If you haven’t seen the movie – we highly recommend it to you.

Fireproof Your Marriage – is the room where you can find help in working on a marriage that isn’t doing well. There is a forty day love dare challenge where you are given one thing to do to bless your spouse for a total of 40 days. This idea came from the movie called, “Fireproof.” If you haven’t seen this movie it is another one we highly recommend.

Husbands Only – is for the men to enter without their wives. This room provides date night ideas, romantic ideas and lots of ideas on the drop down menu for each of the annual holidays. We welcome your input here. If you have romanced your bride in a way that others would find helpful, please leave your comments. This room is a men’s club only and one the wives will be sure to encourage you to enter as often as you like!

Our Story is obviously how God brought us together. We love giving testimony to something He has done in our lives. And it is marvelous in our eyes!

Soil Samples is the room where you can find lots and lots of date night questions. There is no need to be bored in your relationship. You simply need to know the right questions to ask to get the conversation going. This room is here to help you communicate on a deeper level.

The Tasting Room is the room where you can find help in regards to romance and sex in your marriage. The Bible makes it clear that the love shared between a husband and wife is beautiful. These resources will help you grow the physical expression of your love in a God-glorifying way. And it’s FUN!

The Wine Press – this room helps couples who are finding themselves in very trying circumstances either from within their marriage or outside their marriage. Trouble is something God promises we will face in this life – how we handle it determines the health of our spiritual and marriage relationship. The topics discussed include: Anger, Forgiveness, Honor, Cravings and Conflict, Defining Sin, Biblical Roles, etc. Take some time in this room to squeeze out all the good God has for you in the difficult places.

Vintage Collection is the storehouse of some of our favorite date night ideas in the Orlando area. However, there are a other ideas listed that anyone could use.

Wine Train – Offers a drop down menu where you can see date night ideas from contributors to our Vineyard. Click on the Wine Train link to see the list of our favorite marriage blogs. We are not alone in our quest to help marriages become all that God desires them to be.

Wives Only – is for the wives to find great ideas to surprise and romance their husbands. Click on the drop down menu to see ideas for all the holidays throughout the year. We welcome your ideas as well – tell us by commenting what has worked for you and your husband.

You’re Engaged – This room is for all who are about to enter into a lifetime of marriage covenant. This is the most important time for the health of your marriage. Like preparing the soil before planting a vineyard. If you can prepare yourselves now, your marriage will grow all the stronger and sooner.

We pray you’ve enjoyed our Open House. We’d love it if you would take a moment to sign our guest book by commenting on this post. Tell us:

  • where you’re from
  • how long you’ve been married
  • If you’ve been a part of our Vineyard for a while, why not share the part you enjoy the most.

Thank you for visiting. We pray you’ll come back again and again. In fact, sign up to receive our new posts by e-mail so you don’t miss a single one.

Also, you can follow us on Facebook by clicking HERE. Follow us on Twitter by clicking HERE. Follow us on Pinterest by clicking HERE.

Happy Sunday!

Posted in A Fragrant Aroma, The Romantic Vineyard | Tagged , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Off The Air

Posted on January 13, 2012 by Debi Walter
Image Credit: gramilano.com

As I am writing this post our blog is “Off the Air.” It is a strange feeling and one I’ve never experienced since becoming a blogger.

We’ve had a minor issue with some people not being able to access our site. I’ve been in communication with our tech support for the past couple of weeks trying to fix the problem, but each time I call the problem only gets worse. I don’t think it can get much worse than “off the air.”

I’m waiting for customer support to open, and since they’re on the west coast it seems I’ve been waiting forever! Hopefully, this problem will be resolved. If not, we may be support shopping very soon. An option I am glad I have.

Our marriage can face times of being disconnected too. A conflict arises that is too big to resolve in one sitting. It takes lots of time listening, asking questions, doing what needs to be done and committing to the required changes. We can go “off the air” with each other, so to speak, but when we do we are no longer connected the way our covenant requires.

Photo Credit: isavemymarriagetoday

I remember many nights early in our marriage when Tom and I would go to sleep with our backs to each other. Not because that was the most comfortable position, mind you, but because we wanted to create distance – even as we slept. This is wrong! After 33 years of marriage we have learned to stay on-line with each other and not put the other On Hold. This isn’t easy when you’re upset, but it is the grown-up way to behave.

Too many of us act like children when we don’t get out own way – we pout and hide. How can we change? Only by God’s grace enabling us to say NO to this behavior. God desires us to grow up in all things – to be mature – to be weaned from needing milk and eat the solid word of truth. Yes, it takes time. No, it isn’t easy. But being disconnected for long periods of time from the one with whom you’re in a covenant relationship is even worse.

Now I’m just praying we get back On The Air so you can actually read this post!

Posted in Christian Marriage, communication, Conflict, Difficulty, Growing Strong Marriages, The Gospel & Marriage | Tagged , , , , | 6 Comments

Holiness Is A Harvest

Posted on January 12, 2012 by Debi Walter

Photo Credit: Simon Howden

A friend recently shared with us this quote by Josh Harris:‎

“What you see in your spiritual life today is the direct result of what you’ve put in the soil of your life in days past. The difference between the person who grows in holiness and the one who doesn’t is not a matter of personality, upbringing, or gifting; the difference is what each has planted into the soil of his or her heart and soul. So holiness isn’t a mysterious spiritual state that only an elite few can reach. It’s more than an emotion, or a resolution, or an event. Holiness is a harvest.”

This is so true and can be appropriately be applied to our marriages as well. The husband or wife who is purposing to grow in holiness is going to facilitate the growth of a healthy marriage.

Think about it – the Bible says we reap what we sow. So the question we must answer is what am I sowing today to make my marriage a holy reflection of Christ’s love for His church.

  • Husband, are you loving and leading your wife in a way that glorifies God?
  • Wife, are you following your husband’s lead in a respectful, God-glorifying way?

If the answer to these two questions are, ‘no,’ then, don’t be surprised in the years ahead when less than desirable fruit is produced. Marriage is a life-long commitment to do the hard work necessary in order to grow more in love with God. When we tend to the soil of our vertical relationship with Him, then our horizontal relationship grows too.

Photo Credit: happykanppy

What fruit have you reaped from your marriage so far? What fruit are you hopeful to reap in the future? What changes can you make today to insure the fruitfulness of tomorrow?

Posted in Christian Marriage, Growing Strong Marriages, The Gospel & Marriage | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Waiting

Posted on January 11, 2012 by Tom and Debi

Photo Credit: africa


There is nothing more challenging to faith than to have to wait. A patient has to wait for the results from a test to see if their condition is fatal. A student has to wait to see if their test scores are high enough to pursue their dreams. A mother waits up late in the night until her teen is home safe and sound. A husband waits for his annual review not knowing if he’ll make enough to support his family in the coming year.

There are so many times when we are required to wait. Some waits are trivial, like waiting for an app to load on the phone, but even those types test our patience. How does one wait without worry, without sin?

Photo Credit: David Castillo Dominici

One answer – worship! If we are worshiping our goals, our desires, our plans, we will be anxious every time we are unexpectedly forced to wait. If our eyes are on God, we will find comfort as we wait for His timing. It won’t be easy, mind you, but we will be comforted as we wait.

Wednesday is our pause in the week to remind us all to worship God in the midst of our challenges. He is in control. We can trust Him. So grab a cup of coffee or tea and spend the next few minutes worshiping God with one of our favorite songs, Out of the Depths.  We pray it will be a healthy break from your routine and a readjustment of your focus.

Posted in Difficulty, Music, Worship | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Desire Of The Heart

Posted on January 10, 2012 by Debi Walter

Photo Credit: Making A Home Blog

Do you ever wish the Lord would give you the desire of your heart in regards to your marriage? What if God were to change that desire and give you what your marriage truly needed? Watch this video of a marriage which was changed in a way the husband and wife never saw coming, yet as they look back they see that it was exactly what their heart desired all along. Do you believe the Lord could do this in your marriage? He can!

Posted in Date Night Ideas | Tagged , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Hold On

Posted on January 9, 2012 by Debi Walter

I don’t like roller coasters. I used to when I was little, but something happened after I had children. Maybe it was wisdom! 🙂 I don’t like anything which frightens me or causes my adrenaline to soar with the eagles. Slow and steady with both feet on the ground is the way I prefer it. Seriously, it’s the only way I’ll take it, thank you!

January could be called a roller coaster of sorts. By God’s providence we have nearly every day scheduled with something to do, somewhere to go or someone to serve. And a lot of the plans are things we’re doing separately – not fun, but necessary. We’ve seen this time coming, but there’s a sense tonight that we need to hold on, but to what?

We must hold on to US, and we must hold on to GOD. He is our keeper and the only One who can help us connect during this unusually busy season. The craziness began on Saturday, and it won’t let up until we go away for our 33rd anniversary in February. As I’m typing and Tom’s eating his 10p snack in the next room, there is a longing to be just US. But neither time nor providence will allow it. We have learned through the years that this is okay. At the end of the busyness, Lord willing, we’ll both be here to have and to HOLD. And maybe then, we’ll be able to plan a fun date night to celebrate together!

If you have the time this week why not plan something fun and/or meaningful to do together? You never know when the schedules will interfere keeping you from going and doing in the way you would like. Hold on.

♥ Fun Dates To Celebrate ♥

January 10

  • Houseplant Appreciation Day – A great day to surprise your spouse with a houseplant! Hide their favorite candy bar in the leaves as a sweet touch!
  • Peculiar People Day – Grab a cup of coffee and go to the mall for the purpose of finding the most peculiar people while watching the shoppers go by.

January 13

  • Make Your Dreams Come True Day – pick one of your spouse’s dreams and do all you can to make it come true in some way tonight.

♥ Things To Do In Orlando ♥

CENTRAL

  • Winter Park – Popcorn Flicks In The Park will take place on Thursday, January 12th. The movie begins at 7p. and this month’s feature is the classic, The Nutty Professor. As always the movie and the popcorn are FREE.
  • Winter Park – Morse Museum of Art – Music in the Galleries will take place on Friday, January 13th. The Open House is FREE and goes from 4p to 8p. Live music is provided while you stroll the beautiful art gallery.

SOUTH

NORTH

  • Sanford – Alive After Five presents their annual Chili Cook Off on Thursday, January 12th. The fun begins at 5p., and the cost is $7.

WEST

Posted in Date Night Ideas | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Happy Hour

Posted on January 6, 2012 by Debi Walter

It’s been too long since we’ve been able to share with you our Specials of the Week. We’re so glad to be back and ready to welcome the weekend with some great reads for you!

First, I want to highlight a friend of mine who is an excellent writer. She has just started a blog titled, Faith Rising. The name is perfect for her in this season of her life, but I thank God that I will be able to have my own faith built up as a result of her regular posts. You will love this blog!

Faith Rising

  • New Beginnings – Although this isn’t a blog about marriage alone, it is about growing faith in the only One who can grow our marriage into what it was created to be. Subscribe to this one – it’s sure to help you in your spiritual growth!

Counseling Solutions

  • Pre-Forgiveness is a Prerequisite Before You Can Forgive Someone – It’s easy to see why this post was #4 for 2011. If you’re struggling with forgiveness this post will help you see what you need to do from a biblical perspective. Take time to check out the rest of his top posts for 2011 too. Always food for thought here!

Happy Wives Club

  • Changing the Conversation – Fawn has started a quest to find one million wives who love their husbands and are committed to their marriages. This post reflects on how her quest began, and it will inspire you to join her in this effort. We love what she’s doing!

Marriage Missions International

  • Do Nothing Does Something Sometimes – In this season of resolutions to do things right, maybe we should also consider the things we shouldn’t do. Cindy makes a great point!
  • Year End Reflections – Steve and Cindy include some helpful quotes from other sources in looking back over 2011. And how kind of them to refer to one of our posts! Thanks, guys! It’s a pleasure to ping back to you! 🙂

To Love, Honor And Vacuum

Encourage Your Spouse

  • Encourage – Lori and I share a love for words. Here she chooses one worth defining!
  • Getting To Know Your Spouse – We are huge advocates of studying your spouse so you can love them better. Lori provides lots of resources to help you know your spouse. Excellent!

One Flesh Marriage

Journey To Surrender

  • 2011 Hot Topics – A great way to read the best of what Scott and Jenni have to offer.

The Generous Wife

  • Keep Your Word – Great advice for wives.

The Generous Husband

Posted in Blog Love, Happy Hour | Tagged , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Happy Hour

Let’s Take A Walk

Posted on January 6, 2012 by Debi Walter

So many times when life is hard and the circumstances are difficult, we’ll say these four words – Let’s Take A Walk.  Walking provides perspective.  It provides much needed contemplation.  It’s simply the best way to pull back and re-access the problem.  No matter how large or how daunting the problem may be, walking not only exercises the body, but it exercises the brain. It helps you think clearer.

It’s important while you’re walking to talk, to listen, and to allow your eyes to focus in the distance. I have no idea if there is any scientific backing to my theory, but I know that when I take time to look at the horizon, whether at the beach…

in the mountains…

or in my neighborhood, my soul is calmed and peace comes to my heart. When I look out my eyes are usually drawn up to the sky.

The Bible says, “The heavens declare the glory of God, and the sky above proclaims his handiwork.” Psalm 19:1 ESV

Are you facing difficult times? Has it been a while since you’ve walked together for the purpose of finding perspective? Why not plan this weekend to walk, talk and let the heavens declare God’s glory to you. The heavens are always proclaiming, we just aren’t always paying attention.

Posted in Cheap Dates, Christian Marriage, communication, Difficulty, Free Dates, Growing Strong Marriages, Outdoor Dates, Spiritual Intimacy | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

The Romantic Gourmet Date Night Idea

Posted on January 5, 2012 by Debi Walter

Graham Kerr

I’ve always loved cooking, even before I knew how to cook. As a kid I remember watching a show called “The Galloping Gourmet.” His name was Graham Kerr and was from England. He made cooking look like fun – he must have, for he caught my attention and kept it time and time again. His show was one of the very first cooking shows on TV.

Fast forward to today – Tom and I love to watch the Food Network and Cooking Channel on TV. We’re hooked on shows like Master Chef and The Next Food Network Star. So you could say the idea for this date night seems like a natural fit for us. We both enjoy slicing and dicing together. Not to mention wining and dining! 🙂

When Tom walked in the door, I had an appetizer tray waiting for him with a sign announcing the theme of our date night at home. He had no idea what I had cooking – literally! 🙂

I had done all the shopping. I had done a lot of the prep work. The recipes were selected based on their ease of preparation, how quickly it could be cooked, and how good it sounded to eat, of course.

After enjoying our appetizers together and downloading about the day. We moved to course #2 – an Orange Avocado Salad with Cilantro Lime Vinaigrette. We chopped the veggies and enjoyed Chris Botti‘s Italia playing softly in the background.

Once it was ready we sat at the candlelit table and took our time enjoying every bite.

Next we worked on course #3 – Apple Halibut over roasted potatoes.

Halibut is a special dish for us because a few years ago Tom went on a fishing trip with his dad to Alaska. They went fishing everyday and on the halibut excursion, Tom caught a 179 lb. halibut. It was quite the catch taking many hands to reel him in, but what a great catch. We ate halibut for a year, and we never tired of it. Now we know why halibut isn’t the cheapest fish at the market!

Once the fish was cooked and plated we sat again at our dining table and enjoyed an amazing dinner.

We discovered this date was a lot more relaxing than we expected. The slower pace of eating allowed us to enjoy the entire experience. So often we gobble down our food and move onto the next thing on our list. Lingering around the dinner table provides a great platform for intimate conversation.

Our final course was Three Berry Cobbler with Breyers Vanilla Ice Cream.

This was a date that we are sure to repeat. We had a wonderful time, and this idea could be incorporated using any type of food and the best part? It doesn’t require a babysitter!

We have a saying on our dining room wall that reads:

“The fondest memories are made while gathered around the table.”

When was the last time you and your spouse made special memories while lingering around the dinner table?

Posted in Creative Dates, D.R.A.B., Date Night Ideas, Dating Your Spouse, Dinner Dates, romantic date nights | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Amazing Grace

Posted on January 4, 2012 by Tom and Debi

Photo Credit: wdavidphillips.com

Paul Tripp has said that the biggest problem in marriage is not what you’d expect. Most of us would chime in the usual: finances, communication, unresolved conflict, anger, sickness, incompatibility, etc. But he says the biggest problem is WORSHIP. Every challenge, every conflict we face comes down to who we worship. When we worship ourselves, we crave comfort, happiness, life to go as planned. And when it doesn’t, trouble ensues.

When we purpose to WORSHIP God, then it doesn’t matter if we get our way or not, because we aren’t craving the building of our own kingdom. We are more attuned to building His kingdom for His glory, which includes saying NO to self and YES to God.

There isn’t a marriage around that can’t relate to this truth. Conflict in any relationship arises when someone isn’t getting what they want or what they feel they deserve. Read James 4:1. When we focus on worshiping God, our cravings subside, and we enter into a realm of Christlike living where we put others and their needs above our own.

It is Wednesday, the first Wednesday of 2012. We are going to devote our Wednesday posts to encourage us to worship God. These posts will be a weekly reminder for us all to serve Him and His Kingdom this year. They will include a worship song allowing us to pause in the middle of the week and acknowledge our need for God to help us love the way He desires.

We pray the foundation of our marriages will be built up as a result and that this time next year, our relationships will be less selfish and more God-glorifying. This is the fruit that comes when God’s grace touches our marriage. It is truly amazing!

Enjoy this worship song by Chris Tomlin:

Posted in Christian Marriage, Growing Strong Marriages, Music, Worship | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

A Fresh Start – With A Limp

Posted on January 3, 2012 by Debi Walter

We’ve enjoyed our week off, but like most vacations we found ourselves missing our daily interactions with you. We pray you’ve enjoyed celebrating Christmas and New Year’s with your spouse, family and close friends.

Our emotions are mixed about so many things. Suffice it to say we are experiencing change that is necessary, but it’s not easy. Change brings a fresh start, but can begin with limp. I feel as if I’m limping today.

When one is limping each step is anticipated and felt deeply. Sometimes the step is dreaded, yet for one who is resolved to continue moving forward the pain cannot be avoided.

In the midst of the painful limp, the direction we’re heading is wonderful. This month marks the beginning of our new Bible reading plan. We have chosen to read one book from the New Testament a month – totaling 12 books in 2012. The book is read in it’s entirety everyday for that month, and we couldn’t be more excited about delving into the book of James this month. If you and your spouse would like to take part, you can check out the different reading plans by visiting The Route 66 Club Blog. This is another blog that I host, but not nearly as often as I do here. Route 66 is more for occasional encouragements that happen whenever I sense the Lord prompting me to write a post.

We are also taking part in a January Challenge to pray for our spouse for the 31 days of January. We shared about this on one post last week.

And we received another award this past week too – The Generous Wife blog named her pick for the Top Blogs For Growing Your Marriage in 2011. What an honor to be named among so many quality marriage blogs.

We were also surprised to be listed on To Love, Honor And Vacuum’s Top 50 Marriage Quotes for 2011. Take a moment to check out the list, and while there – enjoy looking around her blog, too! I love the name!

Yes, it has been quite an eventful week, but now it’s time to plan some alone time:

♥ Fun Dates To Celebrate ♥

January 3rd

  • Fruit Cake Toss Day – if you received this traditional gift, and can’t stand it like most – why not make a game out of getting rid of it. Take three garbage cans and give each one a different point value. Slice the cake into individual serving pieces. Take turns tossing the cake for points. The winner doesn’t ever have to eat it!

January 4th

  • Trivia Day – Stay home and play your favorite trivia game. Don’t have one? Then watch Jeopardy together!

January 5th

January 6th

  • Bean Day – Cook up your favorite recipe and enjoy it on this cold winter night.
  • Cuddle Up Day – Hmmm, why would they make bean day the same as cuddle up day, seems one might discourage the other – ya think? We suggest pick one or the other – don’t try to combine the two. It might just explode on you! 🙂

January 8th

  • Bubble Bath Day – Surprise your spouse by drawing a hot bath for them. Be sure to add to the ambiance by lighting a candle, pouring their favorite beverage and playing their favorite music to set the mood.

♥ Things To Do In Orlando ♥

CENTRAL

  • Winter Park – Winter Park Playhouse presents the Spotlight Cabaret Series on Wednesday and Thursday, January 4th and 5th. This month’s artist is Kate Zaloumes. Tickets are $20 and include one drink. Standing only tickets are $10.

NORTH

  • Mt. Dora – A Block Party will be held on Friday, January 6th beginning at 6p. The cost is FREE. See site for details!
  • Sanford – Do you have a great chili recipe? Why not enter Sanford’s Chili Cook-Off Competition. The deadline to enter is this Thursday, January 5th with the competition taking place the following Thursday, January 12th. See site for details. Sounds like a fun evening to cook together and mingle with patrons. And winning would be sweet! Or should we say…HOT!
  • Eustis – First Friday Street Fest on January 6th from 6p – 10p. FREE.
  • Yalaha – Visit the Yalaha Bakery for authentic German food and great entertainment on Saturday, January 7th. The featured artist is Jose Velez and Luis Alfredo – guitar duo. The outdoor entertainment is from 11a. – 2p. It’s worth the drive!

EAST

SOUTH

  • Lake Wales – Bok Tower Gardens presents Moonlight Carillon Concerts on Saturday, January 7th from 7:30 p – 9:30p. Half-priced admission for the concert.

WEST

  • Clermont – Winter Music Series will take place each weekend in January. Click here for the month’s schedule and make plans to enjoy this unique date on the beautiful grounds of Central Florida’s only winery.
Posted in Christian Marriage, Date Night Ideas, Dating Your Spouse, Mark Your Calendars (time sensitive), Orlando Date Ideas, romancing your spouse | Tagged , , , , , , | 10 Comments

2011 in Review

Posted on January 2, 2012 by Tom and Debi

Photo Credit: danshamptons.com

Happy New Year! It’s hard to believe 2012 is here, but it is and will be for the next 363 days! We found the following report interesting and thought you would as well. Thank you for being a part of these numbers. To us the numbers represent marriages that God is helping to grow for His glory! What a joy and answer to prayer this is for us.

Tomorrow our home will be back to normal from the holidays, and we can’t wait to get back into the blogging routine. Enjoy this post until we meet again tomorrow!

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2011 annual report for The Romantic Vineyard.

Here’s an excerpt:

The Louvre Museum has 8.5 million visitors per year. This blog was viewed about 130,000 times in 2011. If it were an exhibit at the Louvre Museum, it would take about 6 days for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

Posted in The Romantic Vineyard | Tagged , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

A New Year Challenge

Posted on December 29, 2011 by Debi Walter

I’m breaking my week off  from blogging commitment to share with you a challenge in which I’m participating. I thought you might like to know about it too.

It’s called:

31 Days To Pray For Your Spouse Challenge

And it begins on January 1st. There is an e-book to go along with the challenge, and it is also available on Kindle. I can think of no better way to start the new year in your marriage than by committing to pray daily for the one you love best.

Happy Praying New Year! 

Posted in Christian Marriage, Growing Strong Marriages, Spiritual Intimacy, The Gospel & Marriage | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments

Merry Christmas And A Healthy New Year

Posted on December 25, 2011 by Tom and Debi

It is Christmas Day, and only one week remains in 2011. A New Year will soon be here, and we will begin to walk out what God has planned for each of us in our lives and marriages. Change is hard, but we have learned it is also very good. Without it we would never move on to better things in our lives.

Many times the road from good to better is marked with pain and suffering. We have been through our share and have watched good friends go through even more challenging times than ours. It is not easy seeing those you love suffer, but this is life in a fallen world and reminds us daily of our need for a Savior. We weren’t created to walk this road alone, and the good news is we don’t have to!

We have our spouse to walk with us through the better and the worse.

We have our children to snuggle with and laugh with even when we don’t feel like it.

We have our friends to offer support and help when we are discouraged.

And we have our church to help us take each step with faith even in the darkest times.

So, we end this post with a prayer for YOU.

Father, thank you for the friends we have made this year in our Vineyard. Some in person, some via the internet. However it has happened, You have connected our lives and marriages for a reason – and we believe that reason is to “encourage each other day after day” in our marriages for Your glory.

Left to ourselves our marriages would simply be self-serving. What can my spouse do for me to make me happy? But Your Gospel message has penetrated our marriages with hope for something far better, for a life lived for Your glory as well as for the joy of our spouse. This is unselfish love which mirrors the love Your Son has for us.

Thank You for not only giving us an example to follow, but for infilling us with Your Holy Spirit enabling us to become more like You in word and deed. May our dear friends be blessed this Christmas season and enjoy their marital love in ways they never dreamed were possible.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen

This will be our final post for 2011, since we are spending this last week with friends and family. In the meantime feel free to visit our many rooms located at the top of the site – sort of like an End of the Year Open House!

Lord willing, we’ll see you next year! 🙂

Posted in Growing Strong Marriages, Holidays | Tagged , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

First Place Winner!

Posted on December 24, 2011 by Tom and Debi

Photo Credit: digitalart

And now it is time to reveal our First Place Winner in our B.I.G. Christmas Giveaway Contest.  Drum roll, please…

David Traugott, husband to Kelly Traugott is our winner!

Below is his winning entry. Note the secret message embedded in his 197 word essay by his use of capital letters. Great job, David!

This is the perfeCt gift and would bE a refreshing respite for my beautifuL wifE (and me with her).  She gives her whole self away constantly and excellently.  She is my Best fRiend And greatestTreasure In this wOrld.  She wholeheartedly orieNts herself around me…serving sacrificially is her Way of life.  She alsO is truly laying heR Life Down for our girls…pouRing her vEry Soul intOthem…loving them, teaching them, tRaining Them and modeling for them what it looks like to be a godly woman.  She also gives her life away to other women in our church…carrying them on her heart as she Prays for them, teaches them, encourages them and Loves thEm.  She is also A Small business owner, with a goal of train our girls to be resourceful and wise.  I know it could sound cliché, but she really Embodies what is written in Proverbs 31.  So with all this, I make the request to select us to receive this gift, so that I may be able to take my wife away for a restful and rejuvenating time away, and continue to fan the flames of our love for one another!!

They will receive a much-deserved week away at our fabulous prize destination – The Celebration Resort Villas!

Following is a video we believe depicts David’s letter quite well:


Posted in Christian Marriage, Contests | Tagged , | Comments Off on First Place Winner!

2nd Place Winner

Posted on December 23, 2011 by Tom and Debi

Photo Credit: Stuart Miles

The 2nd place prize is a $100 Visa Gift Card to use for a night away. Again, we are keeping this one anonymous because she is planning to give it as a Christmas present. Congratulations! Here is her winning entry:

My husband has loyally supported me through kidney failure, a kidney transplant and years with little energy or time for romance.  With my second chance at life, my greatest desire is for him to have the woman and wife he deserves.  He is a hard worker, cannot retire because of my need for medical insurance and yet he never complains.  It has been almost 10 years since we took time away on vacation with just the two of us and to get away for a week in beautiful Florida would be a great second honeymoon and start to this new chapter.  The strain of having a wife with less than optimal health has been hard and much of what he enjoys, he has to do alone.  Getting away with just the two of us would give us a second chance at making our marriage all God desires it to be.

And following is a music video we believe goes well with her thoughts:

Posted in Christian Marriage, Contests | Tagged , , , , | Comments Off on 2nd Place Winner

3rd Place Winner

Posted on December 23, 2011 by Tom and Debi

Photo Credit: Raising Figure Skaters

This entry was chosen and will stay anonymous because we don’t know if he is planning to give the prize as a Christmas present or not.  🙂

Where do I start? First and foremost, she is mother to our children.  She is humble, selfless, intelligent, hard-working, resourceful and beautiful.  She gives non-stop of herself and expects and accepts nothing in return. She emotionally connects with each of our children enabling them to reach their full potential.  As a homeschooling mother, she is fully engaged in their learning and participates in their extracurricular activities.  She is proud of her unassuming title “mother.”  She is referred to by her children as friend, confidant but most importantly, mom.  She makes our house a home. That’s just what she does for our children.  What she does for me is truly phenomenal.  In short, she makes me want to come home all of the time.  God has blessed me richly by placing her in my life as my wife. The 200 word maximum is simply not enough to convey what an incredible person she is. Whether she wins or not will not change how blessed I am to call this absolutely incredible person my wife and my best friend for the past 25 years.  Did I tell you that she went back to college a year ago to finish her degree?

And following is a music video we think goes well with this entry.

Posted in Contests, Music | Tagged , | 3 Comments

My Wife

Posted on December 22, 2011 by Tom Walter

George and Noelle

As most of you know, we recently had a B.I.G. Christmas Giveaway Contest. The response was the best we’ve ever had – and understandably so. Our prize was BIG, thanks to the generosity of an anonymous donor.

The entries were so amazing we had to expand our prize list to include a 2nd and 3rd place, as well as the Most Creative Award.  We are going to spend the next few days sharing with you – one at a time – those who won. Today we share with you the entry of George Romanacce, who wrote a song to honor his wife. The picture in the video is from left to right:

Our daughter – Tracy, our son-in-love – Seth,  our son – Jason, our daughter-in-love – Ashley, Noelle and George Romanacce, and Chris and Emily Morgan. They are good friends who recently went out together for a night of fun while we babysat. We took this picture before they left. 🙂

Enjoy George’s entry aptly titled, My Wife:

Posted in Contests | 2 Comments